Article Pwn Up: Vidjagames University

By Jake Young / October 28, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

Pwn Up: Vidjagames University  

 

When I was in my late teens I started looking for a college to attend. At one particular college, I got to preview it overnight - which just so happened to be around when Halo 2 came out. Throughout the day we were supposed to go see what classes were like, tour the campus, and sit through seminars. Instead, I played Halo 2 in an abandoned classroom with some students and ditched the program. I ended up going to that school after all. I like to think it was Halo 2's doing.

-Loren

 

I'm an assistant teacher (or at least I think that's a similar term for what I do) at the University of Buenos Aires, here in Argentina.

Since I have to write up the practical exams, I usually try to include some gaming references in them. For example, in this semester's exam, the test was about a company named "Abstergo", whose founder was "Augusto Desmond" and they have to choose between a system called "Renaissance" offered by a company by the name of "Ezio" and a system called "Eagle", offered by "Altair".

 Even though the references are pretty obvious, I've received no comments from the students so far. How disappointing. Students should play more videogames.

 -Gustavo

 

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Article Pwn Up: Halo...Is It Me You're Looking For?

By Andrew Bridgman / October 21, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

 

Pwn Up: HaloIs It Me Youre Looking For

 

This week, my girlfriend and I had our fifth year anniversary. The day was nearly over and we didn't have enough time to enjoy a romantic movie, so I said I had an alternative and popped in The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask. Knowing she didn't know a whole lot about it, I played through the entire Kafei and Anju sidequest. She smiled at Anju's promise to wait, sat there scared that Kafei wouldn't make it back to the inn in time, and was utterly gratified when Kafei and Anju finally reunited.

-Michael

 

Back in the day when Halo first came out, I had a group of friends that always hung out and played multiplayer. One of the guys, lets call him KC,  was REALLY into his gamertag: Knight.  One night when we were playing, before he could sign into the game I created a character under his gamertag, thus rendering him unable to choose the name Knight in the current game.  This upset him so much that he ran downstairs (playing system link) and tried to break down the door which we had locked. After that proved useless he packed his stuff and drove home.  On his way home he called us up and screamed that if we wanted to play under that name, we had to fight him for it.  The next time he came out to play, we let him choose his character, but everyone else's gamer tags were some sort of pun on the word Knight:  Knight Lite, Knight Boat, Kniet Coke, and Knight Rider.

-Shon

 

I've been teaching my high school students for over a month now.  I should know everyone's name & how to pronounce them, but I still don't.  One girl is named Hodolis.  I never call on her because I asked her like three times how to say her name and it's too far into the semester for me to not know.  I decided to call on her one day and I pronounced it "Hodorless."   I held my breath, fearing some Game of Thrones fan would start cracking up.  No one did.  Whew.

-Jim

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Article Pwn Up: Pwnkemon X & Y

By Andrew Bridgman / October 14, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

Pwn Up: Pwnkemon X Y

I was walking through my kitchen one day and hit my elbow against a drawer that was slightly open. Instead of saying "ow that hurt," I said "ow that did a lot of damage".  I held my head in shame for the rest of the day.

-Brian

 

I just recently saw a commercial for the new Pokemon X and Y. It was advertised with people ages 16-18. My first thought when I saw them talking about the new Pokemon was "These kids are way too old to be playing Pokemon!" Immediately after that thought I remembered that I'm 22 and love Pokemon. I still collect Pokemon cards, play Pokemon games, and watch the show...and I'm married.

-Nicholas

 

I  completely translated Al Bhed in Final Fantasy X myself within a couple hours of starting the game, just because I couldn't stand not knowing every little thing that was going on. I still have the notes in one of my old notebooks. Yes, I had an internet connection. No, I didn't think to just look it up.

-Krista

 

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Article Pwn Up: PokéMath

By Andrew Bridgman / October 7, 2013

Every now and then, we get a such big and thorough entry submitted to us, that we have absolutely no choice but to run it as its own very special edition of Pwn Up. This is one of those times.

Pwn Up: PokMath

Recently, you had an article about The 10 Most Absurdly Powerful Pokemon In Existence, and I was particularly interested by your account of Machamp.  By two different pokedex entries, Machamps are shown to be capable of moving mountains with just one arm, and throwing 500 punches per second.  I (like any normal high schooler would) decided to calculate how much kinetic energy just one of these punches would have...

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Article Pwn Up: Grand Theft Spouse

By Andrew Bridgman / September 30, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

 

Pwn Up: Downtown HotBlooded Pwnio One time while playing Skyrim, I had no important quests to do, so I used the console commands to make my wife Ysolda a follower and took her out on a date night.  We went down to the Winking Skeever for dinner, where we talked about (what else) khajit and sleeping tree sap, how her store was doing, and how our daughter liked living in Solitude.  We danced to some of Lisette's songs and drank the night away.  Then we took a long midnight walk down by the water, and finally headed home for some Lover's Comfort.  Since then, every time I find a scenic spot during a quest, I remember to bring Ysolda there for a date afterwards, where we'll go for a quiet walk or just take in the scenery.

-Steve

 

I just bought a house with my wife and a few days later GTA V came out, I was so excited I went and picked it up on my way to work at 3AM. Once I got home to play it I couldn't put it down. My wife had planned a day for us to go move our remaining items at our old house and she left early so I could clean up our yard. Once I was done rather than leaving to go help at the old house (like I had planned and was told to do) I played GTA V.... for 3.5 hours. My wife wont talk to me right now.

-Phillip

 

I was at my girlfriend's parent's house for Thanksgiving, and I was set up to room with her younger brother. Late one night, I was up late playing The Force Unleashed, when I realize he's talking on the phone. He's been calling up people all night but it's pretty obvious this is a girl he's into. Out of politeness I pretend not to notice and keep playing. As he begins to engage in some kind of phone sex, I try turning up the volume but I don't want to wake up everyone with the sounds of explosions. As I get tired and sore from furiously ragdolling thousands of stormtroopers, I don't dare stop because then I'd have to face the reality of what's taking place under the blanket behind me. As the night drew on I realized how short the game actually was. I eventually overheard him saying into the phone that "there's so much of it" and when the game finally ended and I replayed the ending to get the alternate cutscene, I got the hell out of there to let him clean up.

Weirdest Thanksgiving ever.

-François

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Article Pwn Up: An Educational Pwn Up

By Andrew Bridgman / September 23, 2013
Every now and then, we get a such big and thorough entry submitted to us, that we have absolutely no choice but to run it as its own very special edition of Pwn Up. This is one of those times.
 
Pwn Up: An Educational Pwn Up
 
I'm a 29 year old whose currently working on his Masters degree in Education. One of my classes happens to be called "Assessment in Education." Basically every other week we have to make up an assessment based on the different styles of teaching and learning (yes, there's 3. There's Cognitive, Psychomotor and Affective). Anyway last week I had to do an assignment where you have to come up with a scoring rubric for a psychomotor activity within your content, but if you couldn't think of anything you could do a rubric on something within your interest. In case your wondering, a psychomotor activity is an activity where the students have to physically perform an act. This could be baking a cake, putting a small engine together or basically anything where they have to perform steps to complete the task. My problem is my content is social studies and most class format involves lectures and discussion. There's not too many activities where you have the students perform steps to complete tasks. Luckily, as I stated the professor said we could do something within our interest, and being a huge dork, I play a lot of video games on my free time. So with that, I came up with a scoring rubric on hooking up the original 8-bit NES to a television. The rubric had steps such as hooking up the RF adapter to the NES/TV, setting the NES to either channel 3 or 4 and finally putting the game in the system and having it up in running. I wasn't sure she'd accept it, but when I got the paper back I received a 100 on the assignment. Now that's thinking outside the box.

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Article Pwn Up: The Pwnening

By Andrew Bridgman / September 16, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

 

Pwn Up: The Pwnening I play a LOT of Borderlands 2. So much to the point that, whenever I have a lot of things to do, I list them out on a piece of paper as mission objectives. The most important ones (school work, chores, doing stuff at my job) are Story missions and the stuff I can do eventually (writing, calling old friends, watching a TV show/movie) are Optional missions. I even came up with a way to give myself EXP. for doing them. I'm currently at level 25.
-Jeff 

I'm a budget gamer, so it wasn't until fairly recently that I got to play Fallout 3. About 20 hours in, I found the follower Charon.  He stayed with me and saved my ass numerous times for the next 30 or so hours of the game.  Then I got to the Citadel and met Star Paladin Cross. I wanted her as a follower, so when I broke the news to Charon, I left my old follower some good armor (Talon Combat Armor and Power Armor), a couple different rifles (my preferred weapon style  in the game), most of my shotgun shells (since that's what he likes to use) and a couple thousand caps. The same thing happened when I was close to finishing the main story and found Fawkes.  As I told Cross she can stop being my follower, I gave her a bunch of weapons, armor, and caps as thanks for her assistance. I think of it as severence pay.
-Shaun

Earlier this year I had ran out of games to play so I started free roaming on Just Cause 2, I'd mainly just fly helicopters about. Around the same time my dad had gotten us a remote control helicopter. When I was using it one night a text came in on my phone. I had played so much Just Cause on my Xbox that I pressed the non existent start button on the rc helicopters controller to try and pause it. As I put the controller down it flew up, hit the ceiling, bounced down and cut my ear. I stopped playing Xbox for awhile afterwards. 
-James

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Article Pwn Up: Pwn Up Or Shut Up

By Andrew Bridgman / September 9, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

Pwn Up: Pwn Up Or Shut Up
I have a friend that I play co-op with in Borderlands 2; we have fun usually, but he finds it funny if he can somehow kill me in the game while I do my best to actually complete missions. I did find a way to get even with him however. We were in one section called The Dust, running around a junkyard, when I say, "Oh, I found something neat here the other day. Hop in the car crusher." He responds with, "No, you'll just pull the lever and kill me." "Come on, just hop in there – there's something in there you really want." (he's an obsessive vault symbol hunter, trophy collector, etc.) He answers, "Well why don't you jump in there and show me what it is?" I sigh and say, "Fine, ya big baby," and hop in. He, of course, immediately pulls the lever that activates the crusher, killing me instantly. I respawn laughing and say, "Thanks! You just got me a trophy!" For those of you who haven't played BL2, there's a trophy for getting killed by a friend in the car crusher. You can't get it by crushing yourself, either, and I refused to crush him, saying, "You didn't believe me the first time, so why should I?" The best part? I got my revenge by doing nothing other than relying on what he normally does to me.
-Jeff S.

One day during summer, I decided to move my PS3 down to my living room to play on a big 52' flat screen TV. While playing Infamous 2 on the Villain track, an explosion happened rumbling my controller. At the exact same time of the in-game explosion, a earthquake happened rumbling my entire house. I thought the game had amazing realistic graphics.
-Carlos

I'm a huge Skyrim fan (a little late to the bandwagon) and recently, disaster struck. I was playing on my secondary account but then when I went to save after about an hour, I accidentally saved over my primary account. What made me mad wasn't losing all my Daedric artifacts, losing my wife and two kids, losing my dragon priest masks or losing my vampire lord perks – it was losing my favorite companion, J'zargo.

Goodnight, sweet Khajit prince – you are in a better place now.
-Ulisse

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Article Pwn Up: Monstruos de Bolsillo

By Andrew Bridgman / August 26, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

Pwn Up: Monstruos de Bolsillo
I recently went to a walk in clinic because of a suspected fungus growing under my toe. The doctor cut off the part of the infected nail to be sent to a lab so the fungus could be identified to help him with treating it properly. Three weeks later I get a call to come back in to talk to the doc about what's happening. He sits me down and says "This is a very interesting case… you see, the fungus growing under your nail has previously only been known to grow on plants" He didn't understand why I burst into a nervous laughter. I had to then explain how this is the exact premise of "The Last of Us"

If this infection becomes apocalyptic you know who patient zero is.
-Richard

My sister was heartbroken that one of my villagers had left our Animal Crossing town. I decided to continue writing letters to her as if I were some of the villagers she missed.
-Jack

So I live near an ex-nuclear power plant and this is the local bottled water…. When I saw it my first thought was that the Brotherhood of Steel had expanded their reach.
-Charlie

Pwn Up: Monstruos de Bolsillo
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Article Pwn Up: Don't Be An Ash-Hat

By Andrew Bridgman / August 19, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

Pwn Up: Videogames Are Fun
I was in Chicago visiting my sister at college and decided to wear my Ash Ketchum hat that I'd bought earlier because of how much I was into Pokemon. I was walking around the campus looking for the bathroom, and I found a girl who was probably a junior at the time and asked where the bathroom was. She told me and then asked if I was wearing a Pokemon hat. I said yes, and she said "my little brother LOVES Pokemon too." Then she asked how old I was. I said 14. She gave me a funny look and said "oh, my brother's 8" and walked away giggling. I never wore that hat again.-Tim

Two weeks ago, I went to China with my parents for vacation. When I was looking at a lot of different porcelain artifacts in the Temple of Heaven, all I could think about was how Guybrush Threepwood would be shuddering if he were there.-Rich

When me and my friend were playing a game we saw someone trip outside through my living room window. My friend said "that looked so stupid" and then I said "You should have seen it on my screen."

Then I realized what I said. I play too many games.-Shan

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