Filed Under » goldeneye

Uh, hey guys? Who was that?

You mean that guy in the suit who just rampaged through our entire security force?

Yeah, him.

I don't know, but that was crazy.

Yeah he really shot up the place. It was like he literally had every gun known to man.

Did you guys see him pull that rocket launcher out of thin air?

Where was he keeping it?

Lt., what the hell happened out there? I'm getting reports of massive causalities from all units. I thought we were up against just one man!

Yes, sir. It was a massacre.

What's this I'm hearing about an explosion? I wasn't aware Bond had gained access to our explosives.

He hadn't, sir. Lt. Smith was pursuing the target armed only with proximity mines- just throwing them right at him. Things got ugly when Smith got stuck in a corner. Damn things blew him straight to high hell.

Of all the unbelievable-

Smith had never been to that level before, sir, and those corners are difficult to spot. It wasn't really fair.

But why in God's name was he unarmed?

Sir, if you'll recall, we no longer equip our men before combat. It's much easier to just leave guns and ammo lying around on the battlefield.

How did we lose the others?

Well, sir… Bond retrieved the Golden Gun.

He found the Golden Gun? Did you leave it in a dark corner like I asked?

Yes, sir.

How dark?

Very dark, sir.

Damn. There's no way we could have foreseen this. Well, were you at least able to eliminate the target?

Well, sir, I was able to corner Bond once he ran out of ammo. I had him point blank.

And…?