Article The Dorklyst: The 8 Most Irresponsible Drinkers in Videogame History

By Andrew Bridgman / February 8, 2013
The Dorklyst: The 8 Most Irresponsible Drinkers in Videogame History - Image 11

There are a lot of things you should never do drunk – drive, text, walk, pretty much anything except "fall asleep and hope you wake up with a low-level headache." The list gets even longer when you're a videogame character, who should probably be saving the world or preparing for battle instead of trying to re-enact the SHOTS video. But that never stopped some virtual characters from takin' a few swigs too many at some inappropriate times. These are the 8 most irresponsible drinkers in videogame history.

8. Commander Shepard (Mass Effect 2)

The Dorklyst: The 9 Most Irresponsible Drunks in Videogame History - Image 1

While he's supposedly in a race against time to recruit a team to save the universe from the Reaper menace, Commander Shepard can sidle up to a bar and ask for a few drinks. And if he keeps asking for drinks, eventually the turian bartender will offer to make a special krogan drink for him, since Shepard's pretty sure he can handle it (having already come back from the dead once this game, odds are they can resurrect his liver once more, right?). It's a drink that's so strong that it's practically radioactive (which usually doesn't matter for krogans, given the whole "our entire race is dying out anyway" thing). If Shepard takes the drink, he instantly passes out and wakes up on a bathroom floor. Ignoring the nasty questions of how exactly he ended up there, it feels like maybe Shepard should get back to trying to stop those deep space-dwelling civilization-eaters instead of knocking back space-margaritas and passing out in front of urinals.

Filed Under   alcohol   the dorklyst
Pokemon Beer Pong Table

Picture Pokemon Beer Pong Table

February 06, 2013

Use the Master Pong Ball.

Filed Under   college   Beer   alcohol   pokemon
Harry Potter Tequila

Picture Harry Potter Tequila

January 24, 2013

Yer a drunkard, Harry.

Minecraft Pickaxe Bottle Opener

Picture Minecraft Pickaxe Bottle Opener

November 29, 2012

Hops and barley are the rarest ore of all.

Filed Under   alcohol   minecraft
Bottlecap Link

Picture Bottlecap Link

November 12, 2012

From the makers of Lon Lon Ale.

Filed Under   Beer   alcohol   zelda   link
Quidditch Pong

Picture Quidditch Pong

November 07, 2012

If you drink enough, it's actually pretty similar to living in a world of magic.

TARDIS Alcohol Cabinet

Picture TARDIS Alcohol Cabinet

September 14, 2012

It's drunker on the inside than the outside.

Filed Under   alcohol   dr. who   doctor who   tardis
A Drinking Game of Thrones

Picture A Drinking Game of Thrones

September 10, 2012

Become the mother of beer bongs.

Article 7 More Drink Recipes From The Drunken Moogle

By The Drunken Moogle / June 18, 2012

7 More Drink Recipes From The Drunken Moogle - Image 1

Hadouken – Ryu (Street Fighter shot)

Ingredients:
3/4 oz blue curacao
3/4 oz Fireball Cinnamon Whisky
Splash of Bacardi 151

Directions: Mix the blue curacao and Fireball in a shot glass. Layer a thin bit of Bacardi 151 (or other overproof rum) on the top and light on fire. Block to extinguish and drink! Add more Bacardi 151 to the top to make it a Shinkuu Hadouken.

Filed Under   alcohol   the drunken moogle   drinks
Admiral Akbar Rum

Picture Admiral Akbar Rum

May 01, 2012

No one can deflect shots of this magnitude.

Filed Under   alcohol   star wars