15.

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Tony Stark: You're embarrassing me in front of the wizards.

I feel like this might have been a subtle callback to Thor yelling something similar at Hulk ("You're embarrassing me! I told them we're friends!"), but regardless it's great that Bruce Banner/Hulk are continually embarrassing other Avengers with their behavior. Also? Tony Stark just found out MAGIC was real and doesn't seem entirely phased by it.



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Bruce Banner: There's an Ant-Man and a Spider-Man?

It's easy to forget how much has happened since Banner went into space - but yeah, he's missed the past 3 years of Earth-set events, including TWO bug-themed heroes revealing themselves. And honestly, 2 is a LOT of bug-themed superheroes when you think about it.



13.

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Thor: He gave you his eye?

Rocket: No, he gave me 100 credits. I snuck in his room later that night and stole his eye.

Thor: Thank you, sweet rabbit.

Rocket: Oh, I would've washed that. The only way I could sneak it off is up my... hey we're here.

Rocket's hoarder mindset is one of his more endearing traits - and the whole exchange of him revealing that he stole a guy's eye, Thor unthinkingly just shoving it in his eye socket, and Rocket implying he had hidden it up his butt all makes for some great comedy. Please, keep Thor and Rocket teamed up indefinitely, because they are a wonderful pair.



12.

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Loki: Well, for one thing, I'm not Asgardian. And for another, we have the Hulk!

In the past year, Loki's gotten to have some real nice callback moments - his excitement ("That's how it feels!") at seeing Hulk smash Thor exactly as he did Loki in Avengers, namely - and now getting to steal Tony Stark's line ("We have a Hulk") and call upon his one-time tormentor to save him was an excellent moment for what may be the last time we see the God of Mischief.



11.

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Nick Fury: Motherfu...

We almost got a legit Samuel L. Jackson "motherfucker" in a Marvel movie. We were so close. I get why Marvel didn't go all in on that, but c'mon - PG-13 movies are allowed to drop one f-bomb, so USE IT.



10.

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Peter Parker: No, I'm Peter, by the way.

Dr. Strange: Dr. Strange.

Peter Parker: Oh, we're using our made-up names. I'm Spider-Man then.

In every major Stephen Strange appearance (basically everything BUT Thor: Ragnarok), there's been an exchange about how absurd his name is, and I hope they keep it that way. In case you forgot the dialogue in his solo film, it was:

Kaecilius: How long have you been at Kamar-Taj, Mister...

Dr. Strange: Doctor!

Kaecilius: Mr. Doctor?

Dr. Strange: It's Strange.

Kaecilius: Maybe. Who am I to judge?



9.

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Thor: Join us. Join Earth's mightiest heroes.

Mantis: Like Kevin Bacon?

Thor: He may be on the team. I don't know. I haven't been there in a while.

Thor: Ragnarok went a long way to make Thor into a much, much more enjoyable figure - his mix of sweet ignorance and genuine sincerity is a great character choice. He doesn't bother asking who Kevin Bacon is, just (honestly) says that it's entirely possible whoever that is has joined the Avengers because he has no proof that he HASN'T.



8.

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Okoye: When you said you were going to open Wakanda to the rest of the world, this is not what I imagined.

T'Challa: What did you imagine?

Okoye: The Olympics, maybe even a Starbucks.

Honestly, I'm with Okoye here. T'Challa decides to open Wakanda to the world, and all it does is put an enormous target on the once-hidden country to MONSTROUS SPACE ALIENS looking to DESTROY HALF OF ALL LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE? And now Shuri has to defend and fix Vision - an android she's never met before - in the span of like 15 minutes?! Wakanda is taking on a LOT of heat, all because they agreed to help fix Bucky's brain a few years ago.

Seriously - if they had just not taken in Bucky, Cap wouldn't have thought to go to Wakanda, and they could have avoided this whole "terrifying alien invasion" thing. I mean, 50% of their people STILL would have disappeared, but still.



7.

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Okoye: Why was she up there this whole time?!

In a few short months, Okoye has really broken out as one of my favorite characters - her tenacity, her no-bullshit attitude, her brutal honesty, her wig throwing...I love her. She should be in every Marvel movie from now on, in my opinion (and hey! She CAN be!). But also - yes, when you have a weird sorceress with chaos magic at your disposal, maybe USE HER IN THE GIANT BATTLE instead of having her babysit her robo-boyfriend.



6.

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Ebony Maw: Hear me, and rejoice. You are about to die at the hand of the children of Thanos. Be thankful, that your meaningless lives are now contributed to the balance...

Tony Stark: I'm sorry. Earth is closed today. So pack it up, and get out of here.

Ebony Maw: Stonekeeper, does this chattering animal speak for you?

Dr. Strange: Certainly not, I speak for myself. And you're trespassing in this city and on this planet.

Tony Stark: That means get lost, Squidward!

TONY STARK KNOWS WHAT SQUIDWARD LOOKS LIKE IN THE MARVEL CINEMATIC UNIVERSE, THIS IS CANON.



5.

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Dr. Strange: Alright, let me ask you this one time: what master do you serve?

Peter Quill: "What master do I serve?" What am I supposed to say? Jesus?

It's definitely a funny nod to the comics that Strange - despite being a modern day surgeon - still has a bit of the vocabulary and worldview of Stephen Strange from the comics: he asks if Spider-Man is Tony Stark's "ward," he asks what master Quill serves, etc. And Quill's baffled response to it works really well - although something tells me it would be hard to be too into most modern religions once you've met your planet-dad and held an Infinity Stone. I don't think the Bible really squares with any of that.



4.

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Eitri: You're about to take the full force of a star. It'll kill you.

Thor: Only if I die.

Eitri: Yes...that's what "kill you" means.

Mmm I don't have much to say about Extremely Large Space Tyrion other than this line was great.



3.

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Thor: Families can be tough. Before my father died, he told me I had a half-sister that he imprisoned in hell. Then she returned home and stabbed me in the eye. So I had to kill her. I feel your pain.

Peter Quill: I feel your pain as well. I know this is not a competition, but I've been through a lot. My father killed my mother. Then I had to kill my father. That was hard. Probably even harder than having to kill a sister. At least I came out with both my eyes.

The family histories of two of Marvel's handsomest Chrises (Hemsworth and Pratt) is very, very funny when it's broken down for us all at once - they've led surprisingly dramatic lives for only having a few films apiece, and the trauma they've both gone through should prrrrrrrobably have more of an effect on them than it does.



2.

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Thor: Oh, by the way, this is a friend of mine. Tree.

Groot: I am Groot!

Steve Rogers: I am Steve Rogers.

Steve Rogers had surprisingly little to do in Infinity War - but his earnest response to Groot was sweet and very, very Captain America-ish. I truly hope Chris Evans never leaves this role, but I hope that if he does, whoever fills his shoes can retain his hokey sincerity.



1.

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Peter Quill: I'm gonna ask you this one time, where is Gamora?

Tony Stark: Yeah, I'll do you one better - WHO is Gamora?

Drax: I'll do YOU one better! WHY is Gamora?

I saw a screening of Avengers: Infinity War at 9am - not exactly the ideal experience for such a raucous, fan-service-filled experience like this. I know other audiences went wild for certain moments of the film, but mine largely DID NOT. Except for this line - Drax had a ton of very funny moments throughout the film (trying to eat chips so slowly he would be invisible, refusing to obey any sort of strategic approach to fighting Thanos, etc.), but it was THIS line that really brought the house down. Drax attempts to understand the nuances of language remain ripe territory for comedy, along with allowing Dave Bautista to truly shine.