Hey Foggy, how're things since The Second Incident?
Oh, you mean when the Big Purple Guy went up against Webby McGee and Goatee Gandalf and Robo-Suit and the Big Green Guy? Okay, I guess.
Yeah, good thing we were all mysteriously napping while the Second Incident was going on, which didn't allow us to participate in the battle or contribute in any kind of tangible way.
We were all definitely around, though. This IS a connected universe that we are also involved in.
Oh absolutely. We're important members of this universe, and of New York City, specifically.
When there's an attack on New York City, as it would be absurd to presume otherwise.
...did you all see Webby McGee jump onto that giant floating ring-shaped spaceship thingy? Crazy.
OH GOD - JUST CALL HIM 'SPIDER-MAN.' WE ALL KNOW HIS NAME. WHY DO WE KEEP DOING THIS?!
NO. NO, MATT. I'M SICK OF THIS SHIT. I'M SICK OF CALLING SPIDER-MAN 'WEBBY MCGEE' FOR NO REASON. I'M SICK OF CALLING THE HULK 'THE BIG GREEN GUY.' WE KNOW THEIR NAMES - JUST SAY THEM!
Listen, we're all shaken after The Second Incident-
NO. NO, THAT'S BULLSHIT AND YOU KNOW IT, JONES. "SECOND INCIDENT"?! THERE WAS AN ALIEN SPACESHIP FLOATING OVER NEW YORK CITY AND NONE OF US GOT TO DO JACKSHIT ABOUT IT.
Foggy - it was practically 4 subway stops away, we never could have gotten there in time.
WHY DO WE PRETEND WE'RE IN THE SAME WORLD AS ALL OF THESE ACTUAL SUPERPOWERED HEROES?! THEY'RE THE ONES FIGHTING ALIEN THREATS IN EPIC BATTLES, WHILE WE JUST FLAIL AIMLESSLY AGAINST MYSTICAL NINJA BULLSHIT THAT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE ANY SENSE.
Oh look - Goatee Gandalf's necklace! I know what we should do with it!
Use its incalculable power to influence the major events of the Marvel universe in a meaningful way?
No - return it to him between scenes in a way that doesn't contradict film continuity!
...CAN WE AT LEAST CALL IT "THE TIME THANOS ATTACKED NEW YORK AND WE DIDN'T DO SHIT ABOUT IT"?