Nintendo released its first social networking app this month: Miitomo! Miitomo offers an unprecedented opportunity to get to know your friends in a new context. You could get them to answer questions you never thought to ask before: What would they look like if they wore a baguette as a hat? What do they like to do to relieve stress? And the most important question of all: what do they picture when they picture flowers blooming??? Too bad everyone's friends are awful and they ruined Nintendo's sweet, earnest attempts at building an online social utopia. Scroll down and watch the world burn.