1. Cap Tumbles with Underwear Snake Ronald Reagan

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This is more like it. On one side we have Steve Rogers, who at the time had grown disillusioned with America and simply went by "The Captain." Across the desk we have none other than sitting President Ronald Reagan, turned into an evil snake creature by the Serpent Society. Someone fed their children with the money they made writing this. 

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Reagan wastes no time and disrobes for the fight, leaving on his underwear for national security reasons. He actually wrestles with Cap up close before grabbing the closest piece of weaponized symbolism he can find. Because superheroes never stop talking to themselves in their heads, Steve explains to himself that sweat was the weirdest part about the mostly-nude lizard President. Pinpointing this as a weakness in the transformative state that he has never before encountered, Cap does everything he can to keep the Gipper's perspiration levels high. Soon enough, those briefs are awash in a reptile ball swamp.

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Sure enough, the sweat disintegrates Reagan's snakeskin and the President is left half-naked and sobbing, his saggy 77-year old moobs presumably lurking beneath the frame. The President lives on, but look at those sparkly fangs! Is he still a snakeman? Or was he one of them all along?? Could this be another attempt at ham-fisted political commentary in a Captain America comic book???