1. Civilization

6 More Videogame Worlds It Would Seriously Suck To Live In

Welcome to your new civilization! As a citizen of this new society, you will be ruled by an immortal god-king with complete control over every aspect of your life and the entire civilization. Also, you will be more or less in a state of constant warfare with the rest of the world. Building ANYTHING takes decades upon decades. If you're one of the unfortunate few who's drafted into the war effort, you may very well end up being a spearman or a horseback rider stuck battling a friggin' TANK.

Oh, and you're always in danger of being nuked by Gandhi - or if you happen to live in Gandhi's civilization, always in danger of being retaliation-nuked by EVERYONE ELSE who Gandhi just started  a nuclear war with.

 

2. Sonic the Hedgehog

6 More Videogame Worlds It Would Seriously Suck To Live In

The world of Sonic is generally pretty terrible - everything is divided into insanely-dangerous, completely incongruous 'zones' - from lava-filled ruins to a world of enormous casinos to a place that's just nothing but pollution. And odds are you're going to be a tiny forest critter who's subjected to one of two fates: either being locked in a capsule, waiting desperately for anyone to come by and press a button to release you (hopefully they come fast enough) or getting a sweet robot-body and inevitably having it destroyed by an out-of-control enormous hedgehog whose body is essentially covered in blades. You're nothing but a pawn caught between groups of beings trying to collect super-gems that will give them Dragonball Z knockoff powers.

And while humans DID become part of the Sonic mythos later on (not including Dr. Robotnik, who was bizarrely the only human present for the first couple games in the series), life isn't gonna be much better for you. In fact, there's a pretty good chance you'll be kissing anthropomorphic hedgehogs before you know it.

 

3. SimCity (2014)

6 More Videogame Worlds It Would Seriously Suck To Live In

Welcome to SimCit...actually, hold up, not welcome yet, still searching for servers. Hrm. Okay, now we're in and you're moved in to the city! Let's just...ah, shit. Well, you just disappeared from existence, cut off from the infinitely-powerful, omniscient mayor who lords over you all. They'll be back pretty soon. Ah, back in. Now you can live in a bustling, growing metropol-ohhhh shit, the city's already at maximum capacity? That's not good - there's no room for new landfills. The pollution's gonna get out of control soon - luckily, this world is based on cooperation between different cities in the same region. All we need to do is figure out some deal with one of the other...hrmmm, it looks like none of the other mayors are around to make the deal. Also, we're running out of water? Jeez, we really need to figure that one out ASAP. Oh well, I'm sure this will get resolved soon AND WE JUST GOT KICKED OFF AGAIN.

It's been about a year since your Mayor got involved with your life in any way. The city's been in a virtual standstill since then - apparently there's a new mode that would allow the Mayor to play around with the city without having to worry about being blinked out of existence, but that would require the Mayor to re-install Origin. The Mayor is never gonna do that.

 

4. Pokémon

  7 More Videogame Worlds It Would Seriously Suck To Live In

Trust us, the feral monsters with unearthly superpowers that roam the countryside and sea in enormous numbers will TOTALLY listen to you after you catch them in this tiny ball. No, there's no way these god-like beings would ever attack the people ordering them to beat up other monsters for sport. They definitely would never turn on humanity, which they would be totally justified in doing AND wihch they would absolutely have the ability to do.

And if they did, we would totally be able to defend ourselves...well, with other Pokemon that is. Humanity really doesn't seem to have any other weapons. So if all the Pokemon revolted, humanity would be crushed in an instant - and rightfully so, since they've shifted their entire existence to revolve around getting monsters to beat each up for their own amusement...

So, yeah. People in the Pokemon universe are pretty much all either slave-owners or complicit in animal-battle slavery - this is a world on the brink of an all-out revolution. The instant the Pokemon begin fighting back, everyone will have their minds torn apart by Psychic-Pokemon and their bodies torn apart by the others...and those will be the lucky ones.

Because there's always a chance the Pokemon will decide to truly turn the tables, and have humans battling each other for the Pokemon's amusement - never allowing the humans to die, since they're always healed at a Human Center, or left to wallow in the Kafka-esque nightmare of PC Storage.

 

5. Oregon Trail

6 More Videogame Worlds It Would Seriously Suck To Live In

Onward to Oregon you go! Led by someone of a profession not at all suited for this kind of life, like a banker or a teacher. Great start - they're choosing all of the supplies you need, and you get no input whatsoever into any of it. They decide how much food you eat. They decide how long you rest - and they may decide you rest for 99 days straight, and there's nothing you can do about that. If they wanna ford the 20 foot deep river, you're gonna ford it (also, let's be honest, they're going to kill you eventually, and drowning isn't the worst way to go out). Even if you're not on this particular wagon, the wagon leader is going to slaughter every single possible buffalo they come across. The wildlife population along this trail is gonna be zilch pretty soon, so if you're coming AFTER them, get that Meager Rations option ready.

 

6. The Sims

6 More Videogame Worlds It Would Seriously Suck To Live In

"Welp, there's a plate in the hallway and a stranger I invited in off the street is taking an incredibly long shower in my bathroom. Guess I'd better piss myself and collapse from exhaustion in the living room. Hm. There is a floating crystal hovering above me for some reason. Not a good sign."

The next day:

"Time to have some wild WooHoo! with my wife. Should we go for a baby? Sure, I'd like to start a family - and hey, it worked! Great, now we have 9 months to prepare to become parents."

Three days later:

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN MY WIFE'S GIVING BIRTH? It's been THREE DAYS. THREE FREAKING DAYS. I'm still a sports team mascot - we don't have the money to raise a kid yet! AND TYPING "ROSEBUD" OVER AND OVER HASN'T DONE ANYTHING IN YEARS!"

The next day:

"CHILD SERVICES IS TAKING OUR CHILD AWAY? Sorry, I was a LITTLE BUSY mourning my wife, who was burnt to death in a freak fire caused by cooking macaroni and cheese. Also, her ghost is haunting me, so that's kinda weird."

The next day:

"Maybe a swim will calm me down..."

The next day:

"Ah. Now I'm a ghost, trapped here for all eternity. Awesome."

 

7. Animal Crossing

6 More Videogame Worlds It Would Seriously Suck To Live In

"WHERE HAS THE ONE PERSON CAPABLE OF PLANTING FOOD TREES AND CATCHING FISH GONE? THEY WERE HERE FOR A COUPLE WEEKS ALL THE TIME - THEN THEY JUST LEFT? IT'S BEEN YEARS. WEEDS ARE EVERYWHERE. HELLLLPPPPP

-Everyone In Animal Crossing Who Isn't the Main Player

 


 

Here are the first 7 videogame worlds that suck pretty hard!