"Heroes are not born - they're created."

-William Fichtner (the guy from Prison Break)


  1. Scientist

    Uh, sir?

  2. William Fichtner (from Prison Break)

    Johnson, stop asking questions - get back to making those heroes!

  3. Scientist

    Yeah, about that...you SURE these are the heroes you wanna create?

  4. William Fichtner (from Prison Break)

    Uh, YEAH. Crime is running rampant and Megan Fox is the city's top journalist. Things are bad and we need laboratory-created heroes ASAP.

  5. Scientist

    Well, if we're MAKING heroes, couldn't we make...something else? Like, pretty much anything else other than THIS.


  1. William Fichtner (from Prison Break)

    Jacked man-turtles? You got a problem with the jacked man-turtles we're making?

  2. Scientist

    They look like The Rock and Shrek's horrible lovechild. There's no way these things should be alive.

  3. William Fichtner (from Prison Break)

    If you have a problem with these swole anthropomorphic reptiles, just say it.

  4. Scientist

    I am! I am saying it! There are SO many problems with these things. Why are we giving human arms and legs to these turtles? Why do we expect them to do heroic things? They'll probably see themselves for what they are - abominations against nature. If I were them, I'd straight up kill myself right away.

  5. William Fichtner (from Prison Break)

    These muscled-up cold-blooded teens are the heroes this city needs.

  6. Scientist

    That's the other thing - they're TEENAGERS. Like, specifically teenagers. Have you ever met a teenager? They're incredibly irresponsible and hormonal and over-emotional. And those are the ones that AREN'T mutated turtles.

  7. William Fichtner (from Prison Break)

    You don't get it - the only ones who can save this city are some seriously buff juvenile ectotherms. Four, specifically.

  8. Scientist

    Wait - you only want to make FOUR of these things? To save the ENTIRE city?

  9. William Fichtner (from Prison Break)

    Yeah. Four's a solid number.

  10. Scientist

    This is the dumbest plan I've ever heard. I quit.

  11. [William Fichtner punches the scientist in the face]
  12. William Fichtner (from Prison Break)