The True Reason For the NippleSuits in Batman Robin

  1. Bruce

    Yo, Alfred! Check out the redesigned suit!

  2. [Bruce shows off his new Batsuit]
  3. Alfred

    Oh. Ohhhhhh my.

  4. Bruce

    Yeah, ya like it?

  5. Alfred

    Uh. Well....it's definitely, uh, interesting.

  6. Bruce

    Hey Alfred - eyes up here.

  7. Alfred

    Sorry sir - it's just...your nipples.

  8. Bruce

    My BAT-nipples?

  9. Alfred

    Yes, Master Wayne. Your Bat-nipples.

  10. Bruce

    You're wondering about the 'em, aren't you?

  11. Alfred

    I'm afraid so, Master Wayne.

  12. Bruce

    As in, why I would bother putting Bat-nipples on my Batsuit?

  13. Alfred

    Indeed. I just don't underst-

  14. Bruce

    Yo, Alfred, what'd I say? Eyes up here.

  15. Alfred

    Sorry again, sir, you're just blasting those Bat-nips pretty hard. It's difficult to not look at them.

  16. Bruce

    Precisely.

  The True Reason For the NippleSuits in Batman Robin

  1. Bruce

    Yo, Alfred! Check out the redesigned suits!

  2. [Bruce shows off his new Batsuit]
  3. Alfred

    Oh. Ohhhhhh my.

  4. Bruce

    Yeah, ya like 'em?

  5. Alfred

    Uh. Well....they're definitely, uh, interesting.

  6. Bruce

    Hey Alfred - eyes up here.

  7. Alfred

    Sorry sir - it's just...your nipples.

  8. Bruce

    My BAT-nipples?

  9. Alfred

    Yes, Master Wayne. Your Bat-nipples.

  10. Bruce

    You're wondering about the 'em, aren't you?

  11. Alfred

    I'm afraid so, Master Wayne.

  12. Bruce

    As in, why I would bother putting Bat-nipples on my Batsuit?

  13. Alfred

    Indeed. I just don't underst-

  14. Bruce

    Yo, Alfred, what'd I say? Eyes up here.

  15. Alfred

    Sorry again, sir, you're just blasting those Bat-nips pretty hard. It's difficult to not look at them.

  16. Bruce

    Precisely.

  17. Alfred

    Come again?

  18. Bruce

    I've been around for a while now - my enemies know what to expect when they see me. The entire reason I have the Batsuit is to frighten and confuse my enemies - to keep them off-balance. So I needed to make a change. And that change is Bat-nips.

  19. Alfred

    I'm afraid I don't follow, sir.

  20. Bruce

    With these rock hard Bat-nips poppin' out of my suit, that's ALL my enemies will be looking at. They'll be so confused by my Bat-nips, they won't be able to look anywhere else. That distraction gives me the advantage in combat.

  21. Alfred

    Interesting theory - but they serve no practical purpose, correct?

  22. Bruce

    Nope - but neither do my Bat-ears, yet no one questions that. It's all about intimidating and confounding my foes. When they see these Bat-nips, they'll be the ones slipping.

  23. Alfred

    Rather brilliant, sir. I must admit, between the Bat-nips and the enormous Bat-codpiece, I was worried your Batsuit was becoming some manner of creepy erotic sex outfit.

  24. Bruce

    A simple misconception, Alfred. One that my enemies will share - and that I will take advantage of.

  25. Alfred

    Doesn't really explain the assless chaps you added though.

  26. [Pause]
  27. Bruce

    BAT-assless chaps, Alfred.