This week on Pwn Up, we look at your greatest nerdy victories. If you have a moment so nerdy that you need to tell the Internet about it, we want you to send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.
When my brother was twelve, I was seven. For my seventh b-day, my uncle gave me a PS2 and a copy of FFX.
When I was a kid, about 5 or 6, I was in junior self defense and karate classes. Now I was known for being overly aggressive with the other kids so when my bout came around to see if I graduated from the junior level I was made to take my exam against my sensei. Well, I had just seen the first Mortal Kombat movie around that time, and when I found myself unable to really do anything against my sensei, I pulled a Johnny Cage and dropped him like Goro (talkin' ball punch here). I advanced to the next level.
Final Fantasy 7 came out when I was in high school and it was a game my group of friends were all playing at the time. Among the many insane challenges, defeating the Emerald and Ruby weapon were the toughest. I had dumped countless hours into the grind and had failed at least a dozen times in my attempts to down the two Weapons - when one day after school, I finally did it. After what seemed like (and very well could have been) a 20 minute battle with the giant green pain the ass, I was victorious. My utter shock was even more overwhelming than my excitement, I had done it. I leapt into the air and began to shout when I damn near shit my pants at someone frantically banging on the large family room window behind me. There stood two of my neighborhood friends, who were outside shouting in excitement having just watched me defeat Emerald. After coming in and congratulating me, they admitted that they had come by to hang out but after seeing me in the middle of the fight, decided to watch from outside and laugh at me when I lost. Instead they watched as I became the first one of us to defeat Emerald Weapon. I also went on in the next few weeks to be the first to defeat Ruby as well.
Let's not forget: you're all winners in our book. Except the losers. Losers, you guys are losers, which is sort of like winning, except the opposite. Next week, let's talk about moments of utter defeat and heartbreaking loss. Came real close to beating a hard Guitar Hero song, only to have your little brother unplug your guitar-controller? Almost win all the Pokemon battles against the Elite Four with nothing but Bidoofs? Let's call it Pwn Up: Lose Yourself
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