4. We Won't Have Hoverboards By 2015, Despite What We Saw in Back To The Future: Part II, Because of Time Travel

5 Crazy Fan Theories That Make Total Sense

 Source: Reddit

One of the most memorable parts of the MILF-incest blockbuster Back to the Future trilogy is Marty McFly/Calvin Klein/Clint Eastwood's discovery and use of a hoverboard - aka a skateboard that hovers. While not all technology has advanced quite so much (fax machines for firing employees?), teen transportation technology has clearly made leaps and bounds. And back when BttF Part 2 was released, science had 30 years to deliver on this promise. They haven't. But whyyyyyy?

Because, dummy: time travel. When this movie was released, the skateboard had been around for 20 or so years (while the origins of the modern skateboard are a little fuzzy, most can agree that it was in the 60s that they really started being manufactured the way we know them today). When Marty's in the 1950's, some kids are using some very proto-skateboards that are essentially boxes with wheels. Marty knocks off all the box stuff until it's just a lean-and-mean skateboard. So - Marty not only invented rock 'n roll, but he invented the modern skateboard a solid decade before it would have been around.

5 Crazy Fan Theories That Make Total Sense

Therefore, skateboard science was about a decade ahead in the Marty McFly Tricks His Parents Into Boning timeline. Which means we - at a minimum - shouldn't expect hoverboards until 2025 - a decade later than expected. Although, it might take even longer than that, since scientists in our world are also missing out on one other key factor: TIME TRAVEL.

Also, Libyan terrorists are a lot looser with their uranium-selling tactics in the BttF-verse.


5. Animal Crossing Is About Being Indoctrinated Into a Cult

5 Crazy Fan Theories That Make Total Sense

Source: GamesRadar

Animal Crossing begins like this: you slowly awaken, seeing a weird cat in front of you in a dark room, and are informed you going somewhere. Then - BOOM! - you're on a train, with no one else on it, that has one stop: a strange town you've never been to before.

In Animal Crossing: Wild World, there's a similar situation, except you're mysteriously in a taxi being driven by Kapp'n - who belongs to a species of creatures from Japanese folklore (kappa) known for mischief. They pull pranks, but they also drown people, commit sexual assault, and...kidnap children. He does the same thing in City Folk, but he's driving a bus.

And finally in Animal Crossing: New Leaf, you awake on a train, with Rover sitting across from you. When you reach the town, you are told that - somehow - you've been elected mayor, despite the fact you couldn't have been on the ballot and no one has ever heard of you before. But...why would they tell you that you're mayor? So you feel important, and so you won't leave.

In all of the games, you are set up with a miserable little empty hovel for a home, and quickly find yourself deeply in debt to Tom Nook. In some of the games, you work for him to get rid of the debt, only finding yourself owing him more and more as your home grows. You cannot leave the town, except to go to other, nearly identical towns close-by. And in case you thought you could get away with anything, there's a maniacal mole watching your clock to make sure you don't attempt to modify anything.

And hell, there's more:

  • You get occasional letters supposedly written by your mom, despite the fact she couldn't have known where you were going when you left (or were taken). These are to trick you into thinking your family is happy for you (and - most importantly - not searching for you).

  • You are the only human in the town. Everyone else is bizarre, Island of Dr. Moureau-style anthromorphic animals who are not allowed to attack you for any reason, even if you attack them.

  • The museum is completely, 100% empty when you arrive in the town. How can this be? How can a museum operate with NO exhibits? Because it's up to YOU to find things - and wouldn't you know it, there are new fossils to be found each day! Wait. Why are there a limited number of fossils appearing in this town each day, buried only inches underground? Because someone's putting them there every night, and marking them so they'll be easy for you to find. They want you to feel like you are contributing something incredible to this town, so you won't even want to leave.