Everyone says that squirting is a myth, but you want this little guy to prove 'em wrong. You like it wet n' wild and you want a nice, firm shell to hold onto. Squirtle's got it all, baby. This big boy will give you the business until he evolves to his blasting point. Though a sexual dynamo, a tender lover he is not. Squirtle's the type to retreat into his shell right after doing the deed, "Maybe you should go," he says, "I've got work, like, super early in the morning."
After that cold brush off, you could use a little commitment. Hopefully you'll find it in the Pokemon you choose to MARRY: