There's always a lot of grumbling whenever a new generation of Pokemon games come out - primarily that Nintendo is scraping the bottom of the PokeWell and coming out with ridiculously stupid designs for Pokemon, like ice cream cones and ghost swords. But the truth is that Nintendo has always included incredibly dumb Pokemon designs (with some even dumber names), ever since the very beginning. Here are 8 first generation Pokemon that are dumber than anything that came after.
Pitch: "Hey, you know what's crazy? Computers. What about a computer program Pokemon? Yeah, sure it can exist in the real world, even though it's explicitly made of virtual polygons."
Porygon's an incredibly dumb idea for a Pokemon. It's literally made of programming code, but it somehow interacts with the physical world. In other words, it makes no sense at all and Nintendo just thought it would be neat to have some kind of Pokemon to take advantage of the "computer" fad that was sweeping the world.
How Lazy Is The Name: It's like Polygon, but we replaced the L with an R for some reason. Possibly to sound like an incredibly racist impression of a Japanese person? We can only hope.
Pitch: "It's like...a dinosaur or something. That's not important. What is important is that it has a huge tongue. Like bigger than a normal tongue would be. Also, it's always out for some reason. That's enough to justify an entire Pokemon, right?"
This is why no one should ever listen to KISS and try to design a Pokemon at the same time.
How Lazy Is The Name: Well, it has a big tongue and is named 'Lickitung.' It would take a lot of effort to think of something lazier than that.
Pitch: "A fat, sleeping...thing. Maybe a cat? Who cares? The point is, it's very sleepy and fat."
The mark of a truly lazy Pokemon design is that it's doesn't hold up too well when you begin to question the design. What is Snorlax? A cat? A bear? Nobody really knows (just kidding, I'm sure there is extensive documentation on Snorlax's exact physiology, because literally every corner of the Pokemon world has been filled in by the internet). But the primary attributes that were given to Snorlax are "Fat" and "Likes To Sleep." Sound familiar?
THEY TURNED GARFIELD INTO A POKEMON.
How Lazy Is The Name: Snore + Relax = Snorlax! Actually, not bad - it rolls off the tongue nicely and takes some effort to figure out, and at least it isn't named "Fatsleep" or "Obesetired" or "Garfield The Pokemon But Like Blue Or Something Who Cares."