Would you kindly believe this is one of the most out-of-nowhere deaths in any videogame ever? Well, you expected to kill Ryan, but probably in some kind of epic battle – not beating him to death with a putter at his command. Always remember: A man chooses, a slave obeys. Unless you choose to obey, then it just gets confusing. At least they found a way to make golf interesting.


The worst part of poor John Marston's death is that tease – for one, brief, gleaming moment, you think you have a chance. You think "Hey, if I survived being shot and left for dead, I can probably take out some soldiers with this six-shooter." But it's not to be, and John Marston gets, as they say in the ol' West, "shot to death…pardner." Thankfully, your son Jack grows up to be your less-scarred clone. Shia LaBeouf, take note – if you grow up to look exactly like Harrison Ford, maybe we can accept you as the new Indiana Jones. But still probably not.


Dying in a Modern Warfare game?! Well, I never! Wait – I mean, I do…a lot, because you've not only already had characters and teammates die brutal, unexpected deaths in Modern Warfare 1, but you've already been murdered this game ("No Russian"). But at least in those cases, characters were being killed by terrorists and/or nuclear detonations – here, it was your apparent pal, General Shepherd. The worst part, though, is that he didn't even have the decency to use a killshot on you – you're still alive when you're doused in gasoline and he lights you on fire. I guess you have to keep an eye out for friends like Shepherd.