I've got to give them credit, it takes a lot of guts to give a press conference in anything but your native language. Still, that doesn't make it any easier to watch. Konami Producer Tak Fuji stumbles through an extremely hard to understand intro, only to pass it off to Thomas Nagano and Naoki Maeda for an awkward slam dunk. Worst. Alley-oop. Ever.
I get it, an entire room full of active mobile devices probably isn't the best thing for a wireless gaming demonstration. And in Nintendo's defense, the Wii was mostly responsive during the first half of their "Skyward Sword" demo. But the second half, particularly any moment involving Link's bow and arrow, was tough to sit through. There are few things stranger than watching someone pitch their "revolutionary" product, only to have it fail in front of a huge live audience.
Don't get me wrong, I'm psyched about the new 360 Slim. It's smaller, quieter, and the same price tag as the current Xbox. But like the original 360 before it, the Slim damages games if you move the system while playing. I'm sorry, did I say "damage games?" I meant rape them into oblivion. The Slim isn't content with merely ruining this copy of Alan Wake, it devour its soul.
Think about what a "Project Director" for a videogame would dance like. Do you have an image in your head? Play through it for about 2 minutes. Now watch the video. Uncanny.
When you're interviewing a game designer, you'll usually talk about
Oh, I don't know
The game he's developing. Olivia Munn grills a visibly frustrated David Jaffe, who had just announced a new Twisted Metal game, on circumcision and Daewoos. Note to future Twisted Metal interviewers: If you're going to talk about foreskin, it better be Sweet Tooth's.