Remember soldiers, you get more points for more creative kills.
That's right, it's called skillshots. If you kill anyone really cool, you get more points for more upgrades.
Maybe you could just give us those upgrades now. You know, so we can do our job?
No. The system works.
So, if I shoot a gun that shoots knives and I shoot him with the knives so he's all like a jack-o-lantern and then throw a flash-grenade inside his head so when it blows up like it's Halloween, that's a good thing?
What if I shoot him in his junk?
Yes. As everyone in the army knows, it is official policy to give points for junk-shooting.
What about just killing someone efficiently like a normal human?
No. Of course not.
So how about if I have a gun that shoots deadly octopuses onto this guy's head and he's screaming so I offer him the antidote for his surrender, and then when he does, and he's so grateful, I yell "It's a trap" and shoot him in the junk. I call it "The Admiral Wackbar"
Um, I guess. Technically. That's, uh, very creative. Wow.
I think you're catering to serial killers, general.
No, no, of course not.
Or how about I shoot a laser through his stomach, and he's all "aaaagh!" and then I go into his stomach and fill it with Coke and Mentos and it explodes and then I turn his heart into a trophy for my science fair project? Do I get points for that?
I also call that "The Admiral Wackbar". That's basically what I call everything, frankly.
It's what the voices told me to do.