So Rook, how was the first day?
I'll be honest, Captain, I'm pretty confused.
Rookies always are. There's a lot to take in on your first day, I'm sure you'll do fine.
But I'm just not sure I get it. It just feels a little over the top.
OK Rook, let's hear it.
You know when Simmons took me out to try and break up that race earlier? Do you know what car we took? A brand new Zonda! Those things cost about $400,000!
Article NBA Jam's Grand ChampionJanuary 18, 2011
Article Overheard on Xbox: Issue #34January 18, 2011
Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious on Xbox Live? Send your submissions to overheardonxbox at gmail.
I started playing Halo Reach on Xbox live and hear some twelve year old talking. I guess he was doing science homework or something because he asked "Hey, my teacher wants to know how many atoms are on a penny. I think it's a trick question 'cause JOHN ATOMS (his words) is on the penny, so I should put one." He then proceeds to talk about how maybe the answer is 1991 because that is the date on the penny. He then decides his final answer is 1992, which he got by adding his two answers together. Then he said "I can't wait to be my only one in this class to get the right answer. He could not figure out why everyone was laughing at him.-Joshua G.
I was playing a round of MW2 TDM on Trailer Park. After the match was over, I heard someone with a southern accent saying the reason he did so badly was that he had dial-up. Free dial-up, at that. He was also playing on a black-and-white TV.-Michael K.
Article Viva la Dance Dance Revolution!January 17, 2011
- French Soldier
Viva la revolution!
Yes, I hear you, but what kind of revolution should we have?
- French Soldier
Well, the Americans did that whole Boston Tea Party revolt, which was pretty impressive.
- French Soldier
We could find a bunch of croissants and toss them into the river
No, we need to do something unique, plus croissants are too buttery, flakey, and delicious to waste.
Article Pwn My Life: Issue #59January 14, 2011
Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Read more nerd confessions at Collegehumor, and send your submissions to dorklypwnmylife at gmail.
I was playing Heavy Rain late one night. I got into a really intense quicktime sequence and forgot that my controller wasn't wireless. I jerked the controller too hard and it disconnected. Inputs were still flying across the screen as I frantically tried to plug it back in. I thought I'd lost the scenario but managed to come back and finish it. I was so excited that I started screaming at the top of my lungs. Just when I finished, my dad burst into my room holding his gun. My parents thought I was being attacked.-Brandon
I taught my dog to hide under a table when I yell, "Zombies! The zombies are coming!" Next I'm going to train him to stand in front of me and growl when I say, "Covenant dropship, inbound!"-Xana
In kindergarten, we were learning about opposites and the teacher used "go" and "stop" as an example. This really bothered me, since I was fairly certain that the opposite of "go" was "go backwards." In retrospect, I guess she could have meant acceleration and deceleration as opposed to velocity. I still hold that she should have used less mathematically ambiguous examples.-Anonymous