Article 10 Pokemon Pick-up LinesSeptember 3, 2010
Article Pwn My Life: Staff Edition #2September 2, 2010
Ever had a moment so nerdy they you needed to tell the Internet? Read more nerd confessions at Collegehumor and send your submissions to dorklypwnmylife at gmail.
My first videogame device was a Game Boy my parents bought me for my birthday. The first time I turned it on, I played it every waking moment for three days straight, only taking breaks to swap out the batteries. I had to go to the eye doctor afterwards. -Owen Parsons
I once drew my own Digimon character, and all of its evolutions.-Caldwell Tanner
I still have a scar on my knee from the time I tried a move I saw Gambit do in the X-men Sega Genesis game. -Ben Joseph
My friends and I used to play the Yugioh card game in high school. We even had to hide it from my friend's little sister, and once she found out we made her swear never to tell anyone. So one summer I was up at my grandparents house in Cape Cod bored out of my mind and decided I could make a card of my own by scanning some of my other cards and MS Painting an awesomely, unbeatable mythical beast. I literally spent hours perfecting this badass 3-headed dragon with awesome attack, defense and effects, then printed it out and pasted it on a shittier card (Bubonic Vermin, DUH). When I got back home I attempted to bring it out on the field only to have my friends look it up online and declare it was illegal card that I bought online.-Jeff Rosenberg
People like to make jokes at the expense of WoW players, and with all the videos of them smashing monitors and throwing temper tantrums on the Internet, it's not too surprising. Finding the best Warcraft videos on the web is like trying to pick your favorite pizza topping: They're all so damn good that it's hard to narrow it down. But we did our best. Here's our tribute to the greatest freakouts, pranks, and embarrassing moments in Warcraft videos.
There's emerging genre of Internet video featuring girls destroying their boyfriend's gadgets (or in this case, characters) and then recording the fallout. You can actually see this guy go through the first two stages of grief almost immediately: "Hmmm, that's strange. My main character isn't showing up on my server login screen. No worries, it's probably just some kind of load error. I'll just go ahead and log back in
And he's still gone. This has to be some kind of mistake, unless someone deleted my char
.AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! SMASH. SMASH. SMASH." From denial to unbridled anger in just a few seconds!
The first minute and a half of this video fails to mention Warcraft at all; it's just your run-of-the-mill friendly neighborhood Juggalo threatening an unnamed group of people with a tire iron. And it easily could have ended with that. There's no shame in a time-tested "Threatening The Internet" video. But then it gets better. A lot better. It turns out she's threatening her former Warcraft guildmates over some controversy about canceling her account. The best part? She gives them a martial arts demonstration to let them know what they're in for. SPOILER ALERT: It. Is. Great.
Article TMNT and the GingerSeptember 1, 2010
There's so much blood!
Holy sh*t Don, what happened to you?
I got jumped by the Foot Clan. Oh god, I can't feel my legs
Don, you don't look so hot. I think you should go to the hospital or vet or something.
No it's ok, I just need some pizza.
Umm, I'm not a doctor, but I don't think this is the best time for a pizza run.
Yeah, you're not supposed to be bleeding from your ears like that, and your leg looks kind of broken-ish.
No, guys, I just need some pizza. Can you look through those trashcans Mikey?
Article 8 Games on Impossible ModeSeptember 4, 2010
Article Overheard on Xbox: Issue #15August 31, 2010
Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious on Xbox Live? Send your submissions to overheardonxbox at gmail.
I was playing a free roam match on Red Dead Redemption with a few friends of mine and we were attacking this other posse at Fort Mercer. We went around the back of the fort and wrecked the only kid guarding that side. He then without thinking said "Gosh I've got 3 guys on me back here." I replied without missing a beat "You should be used to that". The room erupted into laughter, even his own teammates. The kid left without saying a word.-SHOTBlocker4044
During a free-for-all match in MW2 some little kid got tired of everyone killing him while he was trying to snipe he says "THAT'S IT, I'M GOING COMMANDO!" After that some random older dude proceeds to say "Oh yeah, does the mean you're going to be naked?" Then when the match finally ends and we all see the killcam (which was a quick no-scope in the air) the little kid says, "THAT WAS SO EPIC THAT IT MADE MY NUTS DROP!"-Jose
I was playing Search and Destroy on MW2 when I heard a really whiny-voiced kid start complaining about campers. I asked him how old he is and he told me was in the second grade. I asked him what a penis is and he told me it was like a hot dog but smaller and it doesn't taste as good.-Austin
Long flights can be hell. Uncomfortable, terrible food, and even when you land you are so out of it you feel like crap. So imagine if you fight the battle of your life against E. Honda in Tokyo, and as soon as his body hits the floor you have to get on a plane and fight Ken in New York. That's like a 20-hour flight with super powered fights on each end. You would feel so awful you wouldn't even be able to stand up.
2. Passport Issues
Whenever you go to a new country, you need your papers in order. Passport, immigration slips, customs declarations, etc. These are just a few of the hoops you have to jump through with international travel. When you are boarding the plane at the airport, they are going to ask you state your business in the country you are traveling to. Something tells us that "I'm traveling to Thailand to fight a 7 foot tall guy with an eyepatch" won't fly with the TSA people.