Article Overheard on Xbox: Issue #21
October 12, 2010Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious on Xbox Live? Send your submissions to overheardonxbox at gmail.
(While playing Halo 3)
Guy 1: "Halo 3 is alright
BUT Halo 2 was THEE game."
Guy 2: "But Halo 3 is still good."
Guy 1: "But Halo 2 was better."
Guy 2: "But Halo 3 is still good."
Guy 1: "But Halo 2 was better.."
Guy 2: "But Halo 3 is still good."
Guy 1: "But Halo 2 was better."
(This went on for a good 10 minutes longer, neither of them ever raised their voices.)
-Jeff B.
Shortly after the care package glitch (which allowed you to get unlimited care packages by climbing over a barrier) was fixed in MW2, my friends and I came up with a brilliant plan. So our whole team slapped on care packages, sentry guns, and emergency air drops for our kill streaks, went into some hardcore HQ and saved them up until the end of the match. When there was five minutes or so left in the game, we pretended to do the care package glitch, dropping everything at once. Needless to say, we got some little kid to ask how we managed to do that and we told him that we just care package glitched. He proceeded to tell us that they had patched it at which point I responded that all you had to do was lift your Xbox up and give it "one good shake" as you were going over the barrier because it would read from your disc then and not from the patch on your hard drive. He was hesitant at first, but several days later he contacted me to try to figure out how to do it, so I went into a private match, invited him to party chat, and let him kill me four times. As he's going over the barrier, I hear him say "It says the disc is unreadable." By switching my mic off and on for burst of laughter, I was able to make it sound like he was the one who messed up instead of me just getting him to scratch his disc. To this day, he still thinks he just shook his Xbox too hard.
-JC
I was playing MW2 and started talking with this dad who was playing with his son. Here's a sample of the gold they were spewing the whole time we played together:
Kid: Are you from Texas?
Me: No. Texas sucks.
Kid: No it doesn't! I'm going to go to college in Texas!
Dad: You need to worry about passing the sixth f*cking grade dipsh*t.
After the kid died, he cussed at the guy who killed him. The dad replies, "He's just a product of bad parenting. Mostly his mother."
-Danton
Article Ash Discovers New Pokemon
October 11, 2010- Ash
Professor Oak! Check out the new Pokemon I caught
- Prof. Oak
Excellent news Ash! I'm always excited to update my Pokedex, let me see them.
- Ash
I think this one might be a normal-type Pokemon.
- Dog
Woof.
- Prof. Oak
Uhh Ash, that's a dog.
- Ash
Cool, a Dog!
- Prof. Oak
No, that's not a Pokemon, it's just a common dog. Looks like a yellow-lab.
- Ash
I don't understand.
- Prof. Oak
Dogs are animals, they don't have special abilities like Pokemon.
- Ash
You just haven't seen them yet. Dog! Use speak-attack!
- Dog
Woof, woof!
- Prof. Oak
He's just barking.
- Ash
He knows growl and bite too. Dog! Go!
- Dog
Grrr.
The dog bites Prof. Oak.
- Prof. Oak
What the hell Ash! Dogs aren't supposed to attack people.
Article Pwn My Life: Issue #35
October 7, 2010Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Read more nerd confessions at Collegehumor, and send your submissions to dorklypwnmylife at gmail.
When I was a fat little 11-year-old, my favorite part of Mario 64 was just running around open areas without having Mario ever get tired.
-Rock
About a week ago, I woke up early in the morning to find myself crying. I'd had a disturbing dream which had awoken me and left me feeling depressed for several days. The dream was that I was browsing the internet and saw that IGN had posted an early review of Fallout: New Vegas and given it a 7.4.
-Steve
My senior year of high school, I had a math teacher that mentioned he played WoW when he first introduced himself. By the third month of class, my best friend and I hated him. One night, we decided to see if we could find him in the game. We tried a bunch of names in the armory and found a lone alliance paladin with the same last name as our teacher. It was a pretty unique last name, so we were sure it was him. The next day we each paid $25 to transfer our horde characters to his realm and spent the week following him and killing him. He would come to school angry each day. Finally, we asked him if he had been getting harassed by a priest and a mage lately. He gave us a death stare and we were both removed from his class within a few weeks. The reason the school gave us was for "making his life difficult."
-Louie
In Elementary School, several guys started a Pokemon club that used to gather at recess and watch one person play Pokemon Red on his Game Boy. It became crowded quickly and other kids got jealous because there wasn't enough room under the slide. This fringe group started calling themselves Team Rocket. One day, the two groups met on the playground and had a big fight. Everyone involved had to go to a meeting afterwards because the school thought it was gang related.
-Montana
Article Videogame Doctors Talk it Out
October 6, 2010- Dr. Robotnik
Alright, if we work together we should win this. I mean, we're doctors, right?
- Dr. Wily
Absolutely, Dr.Robotnik-Man.
- Dr. Robotnik
Not everything has 'Man' as a suffix, Wily.
- Dr. Wily
Whatever you say, Eggman-man
- Dr. Robotnik
What did you call me!?
- Dr. Wily
So, uh, what robot is defeating your robots?
- Dr. Robotnik
Huh?
- Dr. Wily
You know, what robot is better and beating your robots? You know, if we examine his mechanical weakness-
- Dr. Robotnik
It's, um, a hedgehog.
- Dr. Wily
Excuse me?
- Dr. Robotnik
Sometimes a fox, too. He can fly.
- Dr. Wily
Oh that's cool. I have to battle a super robot. You know, a Mega-man. He's like a super robot who can steal powers and use them. But, no dude, small mammals, wow that's intense.












