Articles

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Article Lovable Me: A Minion Love Story

By Andrew Bridgman / March 5, 2014

I'll never forget when we first met - at the nightly mandatory screening of Despicable Me. It was love at first sight. I wasted no time in telling you I loved you.

  Lovable Me: A Minion Love Story

via xianghua4kilik

 

I got down on one knee, about the height of your average Minion, and asked you if you would be the Female Minion to my Male Minion.

Lovable Me: A Minion Love Story

via Paul Pape

Filed Under   love   despicable me

Article 3 Times South Park Didn't Even Understand What They Were Parodying

By Andrew Bridgman / March 4, 2014

South Park has been well-known for over a decade for satirizing pop culture in its own unique and pointed way - but there have been at least a couple times when they miss the mark. Not too surprising, given each episode is produced in about 6 days. Still, they hit so often that when they miss, it stands out. Here's a few times that it wasn't even clear whether they were familiar with the thing they were making fun of.

 

1. 'Game of Thrones' Nudity

  3 Times South Park Didnt Even Understand What They Were Parodying

Over the course of three episodes ("Black Friday" / "A Song of Ass and Fire" / "Titties and Dragons"), South Park took on Game of Thrones, through the lens of the Console War between Xbox and Playstation. And throughout the whole thing, there were constant references to the nudity in Game of Thrones - but not the female nudity, but the male nudity ("Wieners" specifically).

 

 

The thing is - Game of Thrones is sorta renowned for having wildly disproportionate amount of female nudity compared to male nudity. The only wieners seen on the show belong to Hodor (and...not in much of a sexual way), Theon (at one point sexual, then later...less sexual), the guy who tried to poison Daenerys (extremely non-sexual), and one of Craster's sons (VERY EXTREMELY NON-SEXUAL). Whereas the show constantly inundates you with all variety of female nudity and almost always in a sexual manner.

Filed Under   movies   south park

Article Police Reports From 'Twitch Plays Pokemon'

By Ryan Creamer / March 4, 2014
Police Reports From Twitch Plays Pokemon

Filed Under   police   pokemon   twitch plays pokemon

Article This Guy's Business Card Is A Working Tetris Game

By Andrew Bridgman / via Arduboy / March 4, 2014

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If you're not living the life of an excess-driven Manhattanite sociopath like Patrick Bateman in American Psycho, there's a chance that business cards just don't grab you in the same way it does people who are really into listening to Huey Lewis while chopping up Oscar-winners.

Enter technical designer Kevin Bates - whose business card is a FUNCTIONING TETRIS GAME.

Article The Internet vs. FALCON PUNCH!

By Staff / March 3, 2014

 

FALCON PUNCH

via Imgur / Youtube

 

 

FALCON PUNCH

via Imgur

Filed Under   smash bros   falcon punch   captain falcon

Article Pwn Up: Risky Business

By Jake Young / March 3, 2014

If you have a moment so nerdy that you need to tell the Internet about it, we want you to send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail

 

Pwn Up: Risky Business

 

Back in the day, my friends and I were obsessed with "Tony Hawk's Pro Skater" for the N64.  Despite my amazing skills at high-scoring combos and hidden tape discovery, I am massively uncoordinated when it comes to anything with wheels, especially skateboards.  Fast forward to my freshman year of college.  There's a cute girl in my area that I have a huge crush on, and I can tell that she likes me back.  She just so happens to confide in me one day that she thinks guys on skateboards are hot.  So, instead of doing the logical thing and inviting her to my place for dinner, I ask my best friend, an avid skater, to teach me how to skate.

 

Two weeks later, a few of us (Cute Girl included) are all skating together when we come by a massive hill on our campus.  Despite having made zero progress on my skating abilities, I look at Cute Girl and immediately flash back to playing Tony Hawk, and think, "What would TH do?  How easy would it be to take this hill and impress the hell out of her?" So I attempted the hill.

 

Long story short, I ended up with a mass of cuts, bruises, and my collarbone broken into three pieces.  It took two surgeries, three years, and a small metal refinery of surgical plates and screws to fix.  Cute Girl stayed with me in the hospital.  I asked her out under the influence of morphine.

 

Three months later, we broke up.

 

Damn you, Tony Hawk.

 

-'Not-A-Skater'

 

 

Filed Under   pwn my life   romance   pwn up   skateboards

Article Well, Twitch Is Playing ANOTHER Pokemon Game

By Andrew Bridgman / March 2, 2014

Twitch Plays Pokemon: Gold Version

Those maniacs at Twitch Plays Pokemon - not content with their original experiment, which lasted about 400 consecutive hours - have begun a game of Pokemon Crystal. For people invested in this (which includes: people with the willpower and patience to actually participate in this, and exhausted internet writers who would like to not be doing this on a Sunday morning) this feels a little soon - it started a mere 24 hours after the completion of Pokemon Red. But the game is afoot, so GET YOUR ENGINES REVVED FOR SLOW, CHAOTIC PROGRESS!

Filed Under   pokemon   twitch plays pokemon

Article The Most Incredible Fan Art from Twitch Plays Pokemon

By Chloe Cole / March 2, 2014

In the early hours of March 1st, 2014, Twitch Plays Pokemon came to an end. The thousands upon thousands of players had - over the course of nearly 400 hours - completed a single game of Pokemon. In the process, memes and religions and lore were birthed - and from that, fan art. So much fan art. So much incredible, brilliant fan art, all based around one of the weirdest and most compelling pieces of internet phenomena in recent memory (click here for a complete guide to the Generation 1 Twitch Plays Pokemon)

And we would like to remember the brilliant fan art created by sharing some of the best examples with you now. Enjoy!

 

The Most Beautiful Fan Art from Twitch Plays Pokemon

via TsaoShin

 

The Most Beautiful, Bewitching Twitchplays Pokemon Fan Art

via wolframclaws

 

Filed Under   pokemon   fanart   internerd   twitch plays pokemon

Article IT HAPPENED: Twitch Beat Pokemon (In Under 400 Hours!)

By Andrew Bridgman / February 28, 2014

Filed Under   pokemon   twitch plays pokemon

Article The 10 Worst Snow Levels in Videogame History

By Tristan Cooper / February 28, 2014

The 10 Worst Snow Levels in Videogame History

This winter has been pretty rough. Snow, ice and freezing rain are showing up in parts of the country that exclusively wear flip-flops. Life in the polar vortex has been like living in a videogame ice level. Sometimes it can be fun, sometimes a lot of fun, but too much can be a real drag. In recognition of the unusually crappy climate conditions, we've compiled a list of the most difficult and dreadful snow levels in gaming. Grab some hot cocoa and stay inside with some games that will make you feel like you're stuck outside.

 

10. Spelunky - Caves

 

Spelunky is great - but it's also the worst game ever made. Every level of this platforming roguelike is designed to murder you and make you feel like it was your fault. "Why'd you make me do that, baby? If you hadn't provoked that giant spider it wouldn't have scared you into impaling yourself on that spike pit." The third world, the Caves, is especially brutal. Fraught with tough jumps, landmines, wooly mammoths and laser-shooting aliens, traversing the Caves is made even harder by the icy-slick surfaces. Getting thrown into a bottomless pit by a yeti should be a sign about how you're spending your time, but it will only make you slap your back with a belt and try again.

Filed Under   snow   levels