Fellow warriors! A grave injustice has been committed this day!
What is it this time, Eric?
As ye all know, within yonder breakroom fridge, there dwells a legendary sandwich, forged with the bread of truth and tempered with Hellman's Lite Mayo.
We all know what a sandwich is, Eric.
BUT ALAS, whilst I was battling spreadsheets, mine lunch was pilfered.
You could just send an email abou-
I SUSPECT WOOD SPRITES.
Article Pwn Up: Legend of Luigi
Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.
I was totally unprepared for my first Latin test but the first thing I did when I got the paper was to translate all the "mi fili"s that could be found. Thank goodness for Sephiroth.-Nadya
I am in high school right now and taking an AP U.S. Government course. The teacher told us to go home and find an article or a video that represented the importance of the Revelutionary War. So the next day I came back to my class and showed them the trailers for Assassin's Creed 3. In the end I got an F for the assignment.-Kaiser
Article Overheard on Xbox: Issue #31December 21, 2010
Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious on Xbox Live? Send your submissions to overheardonxbox at gmail.
So I was playing some Free Roam on Red Dead Redemption and I pass this guy who is just standing out in a field doing nothing. I ride up and all I hear on his mic is "fap, fap, fap, fap,fap" followed by grunting. -SHOTBlocker4044
One day while playing MW2 with a coworker, he said "The bigger they are, the harder they fall" since he unlockedÂ the challenge. I regret it to this day, but my response was "No, the bigger they are, the harder you choke!" He never really looked at me the same.-Aaron
Article Pwn My Life: Issue #4June 15, 2010
Ever had a moment so nerdy they you needed to tell the Internet about it?Send your submissions to dorklypwnmylife at gmail.
In high school, I got picked on by the guys who brought in BeyBlade tops.-Devin
I had an interview for a promotion at work. My manager told me that the position required patience and the ability to follow through. I told him that wouldn't be a problem, because I've collected all 251 Pokemon in Pokemon Gold. -Chuck
I always play as female characters. If I have to stare at someone's digital ass for 5 hours, it's going to be a female.-Ben
My friend once did the Chidori from Naruto to impress a girl: sound effects, hand signs, and all. She couldn't stop laughing at him. -Damien
I'm 20 years old. I recently spent nearly 36 hours organizing all 4,568 of my Yu-Gi-Oh cards, then made the best deck I could possibly conceive. It was a glorious day. I was filled with confidence. I entered a tournament and was ready to kick ass. My first opponent was an 8-year-old girl. It ended quickly with me screaming "HOW COULD I LOSE TO A CHILD AT A CHILDREN'S CARD GAME?"-Cormel
Article Twas The Night Before GTA IVMay 4, 2010
'Twas the night before GTA IV and all through the dorm,not a student could sleep, anticipating the following morn.
With their laptops a'glow they laid awake in their beds,while visions of ghostriding motorcycles danced in their heads.
All papers were turned in weeks before due,and all absences saved for this gaming debut.
The hallways were empty, the RAs were gone,they camped out at Best Buy 'til it opened at dawn.So I stared out my window and gazed at the stars,dreaming of beating pedestrians and stealing cop-cars.
Article Plants vs. Zombies vs. AwesomeDecember 29, 2010
Ah, life. Fresh air, warm sunlight, and plenty of water, garden life is great.
Bunker-up soldier, welcome to hell.
What are you talking about?
You've just been planted into a battlefield.
A battlefield? But the sunflowers look like they're having such a great time.
Their smiles are just for show. They have it rough.
BLARGH!! Oh God make it stop!
Did he just vomit sunshine?
Article Issue #4May 17, 2011
Have a nerdy horror story you want to share with the Internet? Send your submissions to email@example.com!
When I was 10, I tried to clone an Aerodactyl on Pokemon Blue using the trading method. On the other end of the trade was a "sacrifice Hypno" to be replaced by the clone. The trade went wrong, and the Aerodactyl died in the link cable. I ended up with two Hypnos.-Anonymous
About an hour into playing Ocarina of Time, my brother sunk up behind me with a ventriloquist dummy. I was so scared that I dropped the controller and huddled in a corner. It wasn't until 6 months laterthat I got the nerve to play Zelda again. I'm still terrified of dummies.-John
So, I was the weird kid in grade school. All of the girls in my elementary classes were bitches, so I hung out with the guys. As a result, I got into Pokemon, other video games, and trading card games. Being a girl who liked boy stuff marked me permanently as 'that weird girl.' In 3rd Grade, the guys in my class decided it would be a good idea to take my hand and force it across the chalkboard, making me scratch it. They did this a lot, and it sent me into fits. To this day I can't even think about my hand coming into contact with a chalkboard without having a phobic freak out.-Hallie
Article Sex Tips From Mario Kart