There is a new king in the land of broken controllers! After receiving almost 1.3 million votes, the most rage-inducing moment has finally been crowned. I'd like to thank the gaming community for the huge turnout, but in reality, it was probably just a couple guys voting a few hundred thousand times each. So this one's for you, Paul and Mike. You guys really hit it out of the park.
15. Not realizing you're fighting enemies that will respawn indefinitely and wasting all your health and ammo trying to finish them all off
You weren't supposed to win, you were supposed to run away. Unfortunately, the game decided to let you figure this out on your own. Since you're a total fake badass and NEVER back down from a fake fight, you didn't figure it out until you'd already unloaded clip after clip into the unending army of minions. Now you're off to the next section of the game barely clinging to life. Annnnnnd it just auto-saved. Beautiful.
14. Running out of inventory slots
Gamers are hoarders by nature. We are obsessive collectors. Even useless items somehow find their way into our inventories, because hey, those can be sold for gold and we like collecting gold; even when we've already got all the best items in the game. Thus, a full inventory is our sworn enemy: You're suddenly faced with the realization that you can't keep all that phat loot you've been picking up along the way. Some particularly cruel games won't even let you drop items, meaning you've got to run back to your item box any time you fill up. I'm looking at you, Resident Evil.
Metroid (Metroid Cocktail)
Ingredients:1/2 shot Bacardi Big Apple Rum1/2 shot Coconut Rum1/2 glass Kiwi Strawberry Minute Maid (or Kool-Aid)A little less than 1/2 a glass Sprite3 Strawberries
Directions: Shake the two rums and Kiwi Strawberry Minute Maid and pour into a lowball glass. Add the Sprite for a bit of flavor and carbonation. Drop in three strawberries as a garnish. If you choose, you can use your ice beam freezer to cool the alcohol before you make the drink.
Sonic the Hedgehog (Sonic the Hedgehog shot)
Ingredients:1 part grenadine2 parts Menthomint Schnapps4 parts Blue Curacao
Directions: Pour in the grenadine first. Then layer the Mentholmint schnapps and Blue Curacao on top, in that order. Take it down faster than the Blue Blur himself.
It's Easter time again, and you know what that means: it's time for gamers everywhere to give thanks for the random in-jokes, half-baked secrets, and weird nerdy references that developers hide inside our videogames. Here are nine of the most fun Easter Eggs in recent memory.
9) GTA: San Andreas- No Easter Eggs Up Here
You wouldn't know it from GTA IV's gritty, post-soviet realism, but there used to be a time when this franchise was wacky and light-hearted. A time when you wielded jetpacks, fighter planes and weaponized dildos against increasingly cartoonish odds. This egg is from that era, and it's so out there that it looks like James Franco and Joaquin Phoenix made it up at one of their metafictional postmodern orgies. If you fly your jetpack to the very top of the Gant Bridge, you'll find a large inscription reading: "There are no Easter eggs up here. Go away." Which is itself an Easter egg. But it's not. But it is. But it's man, I wish it were still cool to make Inception jokes.
Swords are not always the best weapon guns have better distance, bombs do more damage, and I can never tell whether or not to pronounce the 'w.' But swords were always preferable, since they offered a nobler kind of combat: up close and personal, with the winner determined by skill and strength alone. Also, game developers got a lot less angry letters from parents when they didn't include guns, so that helped too. Here's our tribute to the greatest blades ever virtually-wielded
10. Lilarcor (Baldur's Gate II)
Lilarcor is a special sword not only does it talk (frequently, and mostly about fighting and its desire to kill as many things as possible and as soon as possible) but it also has the soul of a man trapped within it. In this regard, Lilarcor is really more of a character than a weapon, although it serves both roles nicely. If only it could be used as a vehicle and house, it would be pretty much the only item you'd ever need.
9. Sora's Keyblade (Kingdom Hearts series)
Maybe it technically isn't a sword (that may have been a little too violent for a Disney game), but the Keyblade in Kingdom Hearts was unique and powerful enough to come pretty close to that definition. It's a giant key (one of those ones you can't make a copy of), wielded like a sword (except without a sharp edge), and it's effective at combining your childhood memories of Disney films with your adolescent memories of gender-confused Final Fantasy characters. Also, the Keyblade could lock or unlock any lock you came across a magical world for some, a horrifying dystopia for locksmiths.
You can only play through the main story of a game so many times, and with each replay, the experience becomes less and less enjoyable. From warp whistles to programming glitches, game secrets can refresh a stale gaming experience. Here's a tribute to our favorite ways to cheat in videogames.
1. Legend of Zelda, Ocarina of Time: The Biggoron Sword
In Hyrule, the good stuff was hard to get. REALLY hard to get. Even after braving all the temples, Link's Master Sword was only second second fiddle to the Biggoron Sword. To get it, Link had to facilitate the Hyrulian black market between all of the shadiest characters, deal in Odd Mushrooms and Pocket Eggs, wait three days, dodge rolling boulders, and cross the country several times; all for a sword he wasn't even man enough to hold with one hand.
2. Pokemon: Missingno
This was a secret that many attempted, but few carried out to the end. After sailing around on your Lapras for a few hours (in those days, gamers still had attention spans of steel), a jumble of tiny pictures named Missigno would try to fight you. Even better, if you ran away, Missigno rewarded your cowardice by duplicating one of the items in your backpack. If only the mutant fish in the polluted river near my house did the same.
She's got all the optic blast powers of regular Cyclops, but without his insistence on covering up his midriff all the time.(via MTV)
Boss fights are a staple of video games these days, but they're kind of a pain. You can't step ten feet into an ancient sunken city without some mechano-magick guardian spoiling your adventure. Buzzkill, right? Well, remember that bosses are people too (and monsters, and robots, and aliens, etc.) so they're just like us. And, just like us, sometimes they happen to be freaking weirdos who frankly stand waaaay too close while talking to you. These are their stories.
For brevity's sake, we're only discussing stateside releases here. The Internet's tubes aren't long enough to list every bishojo game where the only "boss" to speak of is decency and respect.
8) Ray vs. Rex Metal Gear Solid 4
Okay, let's all step back from our love of this game and the series in general, and try to see this fight for what it is: A giant robot dinosaur armed with missiles and lasers fighting another giant robot dino
with missiles and a Super Soaker in its mouth. Sure it's cool and refreshing to have some completely new gameplay that allowed us to take control of the franchise's iconic weapons of war, but in the end, the only thing I was personally inspired to do was dig up the old VHS tapes of "Godzilla vs. King Ghidora." Don't even act like he wasn't your favorite kaiju.
7) Sticks And Stones, And Now Words Too Psychonauts
Psychonauts was an under-loved creation from Tim Schafer, creator of cult classics like Grim Fandango _and franken-genre titles like _BrÃ¼tal Legend. It starred children that could've easily been cast members from a Tim Burton-reimagined "Muppet Show," with main character Raz delving into others' minds to solve puzzles and progress through the game. Here, traumatic memories and psychoses took on physical forms, such as that of the theatre critic, Jasper. This bubble-bodied thesbian hater (and really, who hates on thesbians?) literally hurled insults at you from his ink pen cannons. Constructive, Jasper! We always want our criticism to be constructive!