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Article The Dorklyst: The 10 Greatest World of Warcraft Videos on the Internet

September 4, 2010


People like to make jokes at the expense of WoW players, and with all the videos of them smashing monitors and throwing temper tantrums on the Internet, it's not too surprising. Finding the best Warcraft videos on the web is like trying to pick your favorite pizza topping: They're all so damn good that it's hard to narrow it down. But we did our best. Here's our tribute to the greatest freakouts, pranks, and embarrassing moments in Warcraft videos.

10.



There's emerging genre of Internet video featuring girls destroying their boyfriend's gadgets (or in this case, characters) and then recording the fallout. You can actually see this guy go through the first two stages of grief almost immediately: "Hmmm, that's strange. My main character isn't showing up on my server login screen. No worries, it's probably just some kind of load error. I'll just go ahead and log back in…And he's still gone. This has to be some kind of mistake, unless someone deleted my char….AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! SMASH. SMASH. SMASH." From denial to unbridled anger in just a few seconds!

9.



The first minute and a half of this video fails to mention Warcraft at all; it's just your run-of-the-mill friendly neighborhood Juggalo threatening an unnamed group of people with a tire iron. And it easily could have ended with that. There's no shame in a time-tested "Threatening The Internet" video. But then it gets better. A lot better. It turns out she's threatening her former Warcraft guildmates over some controversy about canceling her account. The best part? She gives them a martial arts demonstration to let them know what they're in for. SPOILER ALERT: It. Is. Great.

Filed Under   warcraft   lists   the dorklyst

Article 5 Examples of Gamers Being Awesome on Facebook

July 9, 2010
Filed Under   facebook   gamers

Article The Dorklyst: 6 Games That Wish They Were Pokemon

By Brian Murphy and Owen Parsons / May 4, 2011


Pokemon is one of the most recognized, most-adored video game franchises in the world. Its addictive "catch 'em all" formula is so potent it's basically a mandatory $35 tax on having a child. But dozens of competitors have also tried to create their own collectible monster empires; some have done well, some haven't. But every game's subtext is clear: "I wish I was Pokemon. I want to be Pokemon so bad." Here are six of the jealous types:

6) Dragon Warrior Monsters:


If Japanese RPG's were a high school, Dragon Warrior/Quest would be a decade-reigning-super-senior with a legal drinking ID and the popularity of 12 condensed Fonzies. Let the other franchises come and go… Dragon Quest will still be sitting here on his truckbed, pounding beers with his buddy Final Fantasy for as long as the genre exists. Until, (record scratch), that Pokemon kid from across town showed up and upset the pecking order. That's when DQ lowered his sunglasses and muttered "I gots to learn me those moves."

So we get Dragon Warrior Monsters and the "privilege" of catching monsters instead of just swording them to death. Charmed, thank you. But there is some awesome news: when filling out their bestiary, DWM dipped into six RPG's worth of old enemies, meaning we could command mummies, robots, and ghost dragons of our very own. But while post-capture Pokemon unconditionally love you as if you weren't the same wandering jackass who beat them into unconsciousness, these guys had to be watched, or they'd go wild again. Plus, getting a monster you wanted was a lot more complicated than tossing a Pokeball. You could lure the basic ones with meat, but if you wanted an Ultra-rare Godspawn of your very own, you had to hatch it. And that meant generation after generation of monster breeding. But hey, if watching two mummies pork was your goal, then maybe this is the game for you.

Filed Under   pokemon   the dorklyst

Article The Dorklyst: The 10 Greatest Suits in Videogame History

By Dan Angelucci / July 19, 2011


In the early days of video gaming, fancy outfits were not an option. The Space Invaders were as indecent as they were violent, and Pac-Man made his rounds with his pellets hanging out. As time wore on and graphics got better, this simply wouldn't do, and characters needed real costumes and outfits.

Among video game outfits, there's perhaps none more revered than the suit. Be it a fancy dining jacket, or a metal suit with special powers, suits are one of the cornerstones of video game character design. Here is our celebration of the greatest videogame suits.


10. Suit (Tim, Braid)


Most of the "greatest suits" in video game history are suits that have some effect on gameplay. The suit worn by Tim, main character of Braid, is not one of these. While it has no bearing on the character's powers (unless it's a time travel suit and I missed something, but I doubt it, because the dinosaur didn't mention it, and I trust that guy), it does give the game an interesting, classy aesthetic. There's something endearing about a character going through a big, messy adventure who insists on wearing a suit, like a tiny pixelated Christopher Nolan.


9. OctoCamo Suit (Solid Snake, Metal Gear Solid 4)

Throughout the Metal Gear Solid series, Snake has had a variety of interesting suits, ranging from an unlockable tuxedo to a cardboard box, but perhaps the most useful suit worn by Snake is the "OctoCamo" from MGS4. This suit, given to him by Otacon (who else?), is a smart camouflage that can blend into any environment, and even match the temperature of the surrounding area. As you might expect, this makes a sneaking mission much easier. In fact, a little too easy. Wow, I just lost all respect for Snake. It's like he's not even trying anymore. (Just like Kojima. Boom, roasted.)

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Article The Most Ridiculous GTA .GIFs

By Andrew Bridgman / September 16, 2013

The Smoothest Exit

When you're bored of breaking the laws of man, break the laws of physics.

 

Psycho Woody

"THERE'S A SNAKE ON YOUR SHIRTDON'T WORRY, I'LL GET IT..."

Filed Under   grand theft auto   gta   wtf   mods   gifs   internerd

Article The Dorklyst: The 5 Biggest Mistakes Ever Made By Nintendo

By Andrew Bridgman / May 24, 2012
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Nintendo is an incredible company – they essentially invented the modern videogame market, are responsible for the most recognizable figures in gaming, and have always pushed innovation when they could simply rest on their laurels. However, they've also made several huge mistakes, and it's sort've a miracle they're still a company, let alone a successful one. Here are the five biggest mistakes Nintendo ever made.

5. Virtual Boy

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The year was 1995 – the Super Nintendo Entertainment Systems (SNES) was already 5 years old, and the Nintendo 64 wouldn't be released for another year. Gamers wanted something new – something they hadn't experienced before: they wanted to jam their faces into a piece of plastic held up by a thin legs and play games with ugly graphics in nothing but red and black colors. Or, at least, that's what Nintendo thought was the case.

It's hard to tell what Nintendo's intention was with the Virtual Boy at all – it couldn't have been to replace the Game Boy, because it wasn't easily portable at all, and required a hard, flat surface for use. It definitely wasn't their idea of a "next gen" console, since it was developed concurrently with the Nintendo 64 (which was released a year later). It was the ugly red-headed (literally) stepchild. And, at some point, Nintendo realized that too. They rushed it to release so they could move all development resources to the upcoming Nintendo 64. The result? Nintendo's first major failure.

How bad did it do? It was only out for a year, and only 22 games were released (and less than 15 were released in North America). After that, it was gone for good. Papa told me he took it to a farm upstate, the same one he took our dog to when he got too old and sick. I bet Rex is jamming his face in it right now.

Fun Fact: The game largely thought to be the worst one for the Virtual Boy was Water World. And when you consider Virtual Boy is Nintendo's worst system – that may make Water World for Virtual Boy the worst game in history. Good news, ET for Atari.

Article Disappointing Videogame Facts

By Andrew Bridgman / August 13, 2012

The Wii series (Sports, Fit, Motion, etc.), which has spanned about 6 years, has sold approximately triple the entire Legend of Zelda series, which has spanned 25 years.
Disappointing Videogame Facts - Image 1

Filed Under   nintendo   facts   disappointing

Article 10 Pokemon Pick-up Lines

September 3, 2010


Filed Under   pickup lines   pokemon

Article The Dorklyst: The 9 Worst Superhero Teams of All-Time

By Dan Abromowitz / August 31, 2012
The Dorklyst: The 9 Worst Superhero Teams of AllTime - Image 1

Teamwork is the key to success, especially when team members have the ability to phase through walls or literally bend time and space. When superheroes get together and form a team, it usually results in a stronger whole, with the different powers complementing each other and helping eradicate the worst scum in the universe. However, sometimes the teams of multiple superheroes are terrible. This goes against all logic, but groups of super-powered individuals can suck - either because the members are ridiculous, or ill-suited for one another, or because the team is nothing but a bunch of pets. Here are the 9 worst superhero teams of all-time.

9. X-Force/X-Statix

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The original X-Force was a Rob Liefield-created posse of loud muscular guys who thought coolness was determined by the number of pouches strewn across your massive build, with names like "Shatterstar" and "Warpath," led by King Pouch-Enthusiast, Cable. It sold tremendously well and helped to ruin superhero comic books for a little while. After a few different grim-n-gritty reboots, the series was given to the freewheeling team of Peter Milligan and Michael Allred, who promptly killed the whole team in an explosion and came up with their own. In their hands, X-Force became an spectacularly biting meta-commentary on the comic business, featuring a team of self-obsessed, dysfunctional, fame-addicted assholes whose sole purpose is to cause flashy carnage in order to sell merchandise, based on the whims of their managers and a fickle consuming public. Unpopular characters would be killed in the field, so each team members would do everything in their their power to stay relevant, at the expense of the team (one subplot centered around the token black character trying to prevent another black superhero from joining for fear that he'll be killed off as soon as he's no longer the minority, while another centered around two characters grudgingly striking up a gay love affair to drive up their popularity).

By the end of the Milligan/Allred run, the entire team (renamed "X-Statix," to be sufficiently x-treme) had been murdered several times over, and sales had dropped precipitously, despite the creative team giving the Marvel audience exactly what they apparently wanted. The reins were handed back to Liefield, because testosterone must flow.

Filed Under   the dorklyst

Article The Dorklyst: 8 Terrible Levels in Great Games

By Daniel Abromowitz / August 24, 2011


One awful level doesn't make for a terrible game. In fact, it's often quite the opposite. Many classics include at least one conniption-inducing section, presumably to level out the sheer awesomeness that is the rest of the game. Here's our tribute to 8 levels that almost made us give up on our favorites.

8. Turbo Tunnel (Battletoads)


Battletoads' infamous hoverbike run is the level even your older brother couldn't beat for you. Let's get something straight first, Battletoads ain't easy. Where other brawlers were content to let you spam the throw button, Battletoads demanded tight combos and well-placed huge-fisted punches. The game would never let you get comfortable, either, changing up game mechanics faster than most people change something that people change quickly. But there's hard, and then there's hard. And then there's Turbo Tunnel, a level designed with the sole purpose of getting controllers from one side of the room to the other at speeds upwards of 90 MPH.

Even if you somehow had the stones to make it to level 3 with all of your lives intact, all of that could be stripped away in twenty seconds by a few wrong twitches. Turbo Tunnel reminds gamers of the harsh reality that life just isn't fair, a truth most people use video games to escape from. Sure, there are YouTube videos of people playing it perfectly in one go, but there are YouTube videos of monkeys drinking their own pee, too. I don't know what point I'm trying to make. F**k the hoverbike level.

7. Meat Circus (Psychonauts)


(SPOILERS) Indie sleeper hit Psychonauts did a lot of things right: It was laugh-out-loud funny and endearingly weird, had some of the most original and mindbending level design in gaming, and featured a level inside the mind of a gigantic mutated lungfish named Linda. As a platformer, though, it left a little to be desired; the controls were just a little too clunky, the camera a little too imprecise. Nowhere was this more apparent than in the Meat Circus, a psychic amalgam of the minds of protagonist Razputin (raised in a carnival) and antagonist Coach Oleander (raised by a butcher).

The Meat Circus somehow makes meat, one of nature's best things, into an object of revulsion. Tasked with defending Oleander's inner child against mutated rabbit creatures, you're forced to endure repeatedly failing at platforming while listening to the little fat kid whine (Hearing "Ow!" and "That hurts!" bring my blood to a boil almost as quickly as "Hey, listen!"). Somehow, the Meat Circus managed to combine all of the most frustrating elements of video games: escort missions, rising water, relentless, high pitched voice overs, and endless boss battles. Plus, even the name is terrible: Meat Circus sounds like the name of a dirty magazine that I definitely don't own a few copies of.

Filed Under   lists   the dorklyst   levels