Articles

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Article 12 Confusing and Angry Xbox Live Messages

By Staff / November 13, 2013

With this console generation coming to a close, it's important to remember the great things about it: the incredible games, the innovations, and the horrible population of Xbox Live sending angry, insulting, barely comprehensible messages.

 

Most Creative Xbox Live Private Messages

I can see why this gentleman has a 5 star reputation.

Filed Under   xbox live

Article Quiz: Which 'Pong' Character Are You?

By Andrew Bridgman / January 28, 2014

  Quiz: Which Pong Character Are You

The distinct and unique characters of Pong are truly the perfect avatars upon which to reflect our essential and most inherent humanity. Also - Don't forget to SHARE your results with your social networks!

 

 Quiz: Which Pong Character Are You

1. What's your ideal date night?

  

a. Preventing a ball from leaving off of the left side of the screen
b. Preventing a ball from leaving off of the right side of the screen

 

Filed Under   pong   quiz

Article The 10 Most Absurdly Powerful Pokemon In Existence

By Andrew Bridgman / September 25, 2013

  10 of the Most Absurdly Powerful Creatures in the Pokemon World

The most incredible thing about Pokemon (beyond how many Pokemon articles the internet will tolerate) is that, somehow, humanity has enslaved them. These are super-powered animals that should have easily conquered this planet of puny homo sapiens long ago. Yet for whatever reason, they listen to our commands without question and battle each other for our own amusement. But a few of them have no excuse - they're described as so insanely powerful, it's incredible that they haven't risen up and smashed us into oblivion. These are the 10 Pokemon that are too ridiculously-strong for their (and our) own good.

 

10. Magcargo

10 of the Most Absurdly Powerful Creatures in the Pokemon World

Magcargo's body temperature is approximately 18,000 degrees F. Water is vaporized on contact. If this Pokémon is caught in the rain, the raindrops instantly turn into steam, cloaking the area in a thick fog. (Sapphire)


Okay - the surface of the sun is approximately 10,000 degrees F. Which means (*adjusts tie*) MAGCARGO IS NEARLY TWICE AS HOT AS THE SUN. You know that Smashmouth song, "Might As Well Be Walkin' On The Sun?" That's more realistic than being anywhere near Magcargo, since this lava slug thing is literally ALMOST TWICE AS HOT AS THE FREAKIN SUN. SOL, THE CENTER OF OUR SOLAR SYSTEM, IS PRETTY DAMN CHILLY COMPARED TO THIS SINGLE INDIVIDUAL POKEMON.

Although, just to test it out, we should probably send the members of Smashmouth to confirm.

Filed Under   pokemon

Article IT HAPPENED: Twitch Beat Pokemon (In Under 400 Hours!)

By Andrew Bridgman / February 28, 2014

Filed Under   pokemon   twitch plays pokemon

Article Flowchart: Should You Pre-Order That Game?

By Staff / October 4, 2013
Flowchart: Should You PreOrder That Game

Filed Under   flowchart   preorders

Article 5 Mistakes Every Videogame With A Morality System Makes

By Miklós Takács / December 2, 2013

5 Mistakes Every Videogame With A Morality System Makes

The concept of moral choice systems in video games sounds really good on paper. Instead of doing whatever the narrative tells you to do, you can make your very own decisions, allowing you to have an impact on the world, and to see the consequences of your actions. It's unfortunate that more often than not they are flawed, unfair, and brainmeltingly stupid.

Here's a list of common mistakes even the greatest games tend to make.

 

1. It's either Good or Evil, there's nothing else

Quick, think of a person you know. Now describe that person with only one word. What word did you use? Greedy, lazy, selfish, kind, friendly? Maybe one of those, maybe not. But I'm sure there are two words you didn't use. Good and Evil. People are not that simple, and for some reason developers fail to acknowledge that. They keep making these systems like every single person is either black or white, but next to all people are in the grey area. We all have positive and negative qualities. On good days we smile at the world. On bad days we tend to be shitheads. But this is not how things go in Videoland.

 

5 Recurring Mistakes In Moral Choice System Based Videogames 

Article The 6 HOTTEST Sideboob Shots (of the NES)!

By Andrew Bridgman / January 8, 2014
The 6 HOTTEST Sideboob Shots of the NES

Filed Under   nes   sideboob

Article 7 Inconsequentially Cool Things From Movies That Took Way Too Long To Film

By Karl Smallwood / March 24, 2014

7 Inconsequentially Cool Things From Movies That Took Way Too Long To Film

There are thousands of awesome movie moments out there that are a result of a last minute change or improvisation. This is not a list of those things - this is a list of moments from movies that although pretty cool, took so long to film or include you kind of wonder why they didn't just say, "Eh, screw it, lets think of something else."

 

1. The blood drop scene in The Incredible Hulk took a year to get right

  7 Inconsequentially Cool Things From Movies That Took Way Too Long To Film

Source: Canada.com

As fantastic as that shot of a single drop of Bruce Banner's, radiation-filled vein gravy bobbing and weaving through a random factory in Brazil was, I'm pretty sure the movie would have still gotten the overwhelmingly average response it ended up receiving if it wasn't included. It may have even gotten a better response because without it we'd have seen the Hulk punch something like 10 seconds sooner.

For some reason though, the company behind that shot, Image Engine, spent upwards of a year tweaking that scene to get it just right. Now I'm no expert on making movies, but I'm going to go out on a limb and suggest that if Image engine had spent the budget and time that, that scene ended up consuming on something else, like maybe the Hulk kicking Abomination in the sack, the audience would have appreciated it more than an artistic shot of a drop of blood in freefall.

Filed Under   movies   hulk   batman   the matrix

Article 5 Crazy Fan Theories That Make Total Sense

By Andrew Bridgman / January 8, 2014

 5 Crazy Fan Theories That Make Total Sense

 

1. Vault Boy Isn't Giving a Thumbs Up - He's Checking Whether Or Not He's About To Die

5 Crazy Fan Theories That Make Total Sense

Source: Reddit

The chipper, cheery mascot of the Fallout series has always been Vault Boy, the blonde-haired, bright-smiled lad giving a big thumbs up and a delightful wink, in stark contrast to the horrible post-nuclear war dystopian future the game plops you in. But WHY exactly is he giving you a thumbs up? And is there an explanation for what he's doing that makes more sense than a jokey contrast between retro-optimism vs. current misery? As you can probably tell from the tone of the article so far, there totally is.

Article 5 Theories About 'Game of Thrones' That Are Totally Right

By Andrew Bridgman / March 26, 2014

Theory Corner: Game of Thrones  

 

Few TV shows inspire the passionate debating and theorizing as Game of Thrones - and as someone who's seen the first 40 minutes of the pilot, I can see why! There are so many characters and relationships and locations to keep track of. And with the new season premiering soon, I thought I might share some of my most well-thought out theories with you. Enjoy!

 

1. I think Joffrey might be the child of Cersei and HER BROTHER!

Theory Corner: Game of Thrones

Okay, I know this seems a little out there, but hear me out: we know Cersei and her brother have some kind of "VERY SPECIAL" relationship, we know that everyone in the Lannister family is blonde, AND we know that both Joffrey and Tyrion are like pretty close to the same height. Coincidence? Methinks NOT!

In other words, Cersei and Tyrion have definitely been boning. They should call this show Game of Bones! (because, seriously, there's a lot of sex AND like skeleton bones laying around)

Filed Under   game of thrones   theory corner