Articles

(Page 31)

Article The 10 Best Videogame Masks

By Andrew Bridgman / April 7, 2014

The 10 Best Videogame Masks

In the world of videogames, it doesn't need to be Halloween to put on a mask and go take candy from strangers (or whatever personal belongs you can find in the treasure chests they have lying around). Videogame masks come in all shapes and sizes and can do all sorts of things - from hiding someone's identity to LITERALLY BRINGING ABOUT THE END OF THE WORLD. Also, sometimes they can make doors kill you.

Anyways, these are our top 10 masks in videogame history...

 

10. Handsome Jack's Mask (Borderlands 2)

The 10 Best Videogame Masks

Handsome Jack's mask is a pretty weird one - because, well, it's pretty much just his face. Or, rather, how his face is SUPPOSED to look, if not for the deformed Vault-style branded his actual face got. The mask says pretty much everything about the character of Handsome Jack - how self-obsessed he is, how vain he is, and how OUT OF HIS MIND he is. And since Handsome Jack is one of the best things about an already-great game, we gotta give the mask some credit.

 

9. Psycho Mantis Gas Mask (Metal Gear Solid)

The 10 Best Videogame Masks

Psycho Mantis - which, REMINDER, is just a cool-as-hell name - has a mask that serves basically no purpose (other than to hide the scars from when he burned down his childhood village). Mantis' reasoning for the mask is to block out the thoughts of others from his mind, since he's read enough minds to be generally repulsed by humanity in general. There's no real reason it has to be a gas mask - other than it looks really cool for this floating guy in a gas mask magically intuit what other Playstation games you've been playing. 

Filed Under   masks

Article Pwn Up: Enter the Faketrix

By Andrew Bridgman / June 17, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

Pwn Up:
12 year old me was pretty ignorant about technology (I had never seen the internet at that point). So when I got "Enter the Matrix" on PS2, I thought the hacking feature – the one used to unlock cheats – was real. I had almost no idea what a hacker was and the menu seemed pretty legitimate to me at the time. I simply thought the game gave me the option to go into the game's coding and modify it so that I could bend it to my will. The thing is, I was afraid to try it out for fear of ruining the game forever and making the game a waste of valuable money. One day, I caught my little brother messing around with the feature and I panicked. I ran up to him, screaming for him to stop, and yanked the controller out of his hand. I turned off the system and told him all the way's I'd make him pay if the game was messed up. After discovering that nothing was wrong, I sat him down and explained how serious hacking the game was and why he shouldn't mess with that feature of the game. It wasn't until about 3 years later that I learned how stupid of me it was to believe this.-Mario

When I was very young (about 5 years old) and living in Argentina, my parents were determined that I learn English. O never really liked the language, so learning was very difficult. But when I was 8, I started eagerly studying English. I told my parents it was because it would help if I ever traveled to the United States.

But in reality it was because I got just gotten an N64 and a copy of Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. I got stuck before entering Hyrule Castle after the 1st dungeon, and I scouted the whole map trying to find the next thing to do.

At the time there were no internet walkthroughs or guides, and nobody here played N64. So I checked every sign in Hyrule and talked to every NPC I could find. Eventually I figured that if I learned English, I would be able to finish the game.

I did learn English and beat the game. I'm now a fluent speaker, all thanks to Link.-Agustin

My grandma always knew I loved to play videogames, and one day back around 2008 she told me to come over to her house because she bought something for me and my brother. I went over there not really knowing what to expect. When I got there she had a PS2 that she had bought so we could play games when we came over there to visit. I didn't have the heart to tell her that I was well into the next console generation. After that I made a point of digging up my old PS2 games just to give myself a reason to go over and visit her.-Cole B.

Filed Under   pwn my life   pwn up

Article Pwn Up: A Link to the North Pole

By Andrew Bridgman / June 10, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

Pwn Up:

Back in 2006, I was half asleep in my moms car listening to the radio, when they began a contest to win, at the time, the new Playstation 3. Having heard this, I jumped out of my seat and demanded my mom to call in. Fortunately I was one of the few people who actually made the call. A week later, they dropped it off at a Gamestop, where I was given a choice for any game I wanted. With strict parents, I couldn't choose any game with a gun in it (Resistance, Ratchet & Clank), so I had only one option: Sonic '06.

I did not touch my PS3 again for three years.

-Charlie

I remember buying the Metal Gear Solid HD Collection last year, and playing it all day. Later that day I realized I was out of snacks so I went to the supermarket, and when I arrived a cashier's cellphone started ringing. And his ringtone was the sound of a codec call. So what did I do? Without thinking I reached out my finger to press the select button (to answer the call). It took me about 10 seconds to understand why I couldn't answer it. That is how I found out that playing for 5 hours non-stop is bad for you.

-Gustavo

Saw this while driving home the other day. The license plate was "GNDLFWHT."

-Daniel

Pwn Up:

Filed Under   pwn my life   pwn up

Article The Dorklyst: The 10 Most Corrupt Cops in Videogame History

By Bob Mackey / May 31, 2013

Real life couldn't have created an enemy more terrifying than your standard police officer; after all, what other civil servant has the state-sanctioned power to murder us, both with military-grade weaponry and egregious parking fines? True, most of your garden variety cops spend their shifts hassling non-violent drug offenders and telling rude teens to stop skateboarding on things, but a small minority employs the power of the badge to abuse their authority with criminal intent. Thankfully, the medium of video games allows us to seek vengeance against those who've fallen over to the icky side of the thin blue line — a more gratifying fate than seeing the traditional crooked cop punishment of extended paid vacation.

(WARNING: Some pretty significant spoilers lie within)

10. Officer Frank Tenpenny (Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas)

The 10 Most Corrupt Cops in Videogame History

Since 1994's Pulp Fiction, the casting of Samuel L. Jackson in any role serves as a sort of shorthand for the audience, as if to say "this expletive-shouting man may be dangerous and unstable." If he's on the protagonist's side, then victory's in the bag, and the creative vulgarities can fly freely without caution; unfortunately, the first five minutes Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas spell out the fact that Officer Frank Tenpenny is a very, very bad man. His behind-the-scenes string-pulling gives our hero CJ the mass-murderer status demanded by every Grand Theft Auto installment to date, and Tenpenny's own crimes eventually lead to a full-scale riot the aging hardware of the PlayStation 2 did its best to simulate. Close to ten years later, and Grand Theft Auto as a whole has yet to come up with a more enigmatic villain — or at least one voiced by a guy with some clearly defined snake boundaries.

Filed Under   police   the dorklyst   cops

Article The Homeowner Who Lived a Real Life "Up"

By Staff / March 14, 2014

If you've seen Up, you know that it's a majestic story about how you cry like crazy during the first 10 minutes and then other stuff happens for a couple hours, but you can barely really see it through the constant stream of tears pouring out of your eyes. Also, there's a guy who refuses to sell his property to a big developer.

But this (incredibly sad) fictional dilemma is based on a real one - the story of Edith Macefield, who famously turned down a million dollar offer for her home by a property developer, who went ahead to build around her tiny farmhouse.

The Homeowner Whos Living a Real Life Up

via beaverbrown55

And even though Edith died in 2008 (at the age of 86), her house remained. Disney affixed some balloons to it in 2009 as a promotion of Up.

Incredibly, the house still stands there. You can even view it on Google StreetView.

Now think about the first 10 minutes of Up and bawl your eyes out.

Filed Under   irl   pixar   up   internerd

Article Pwn Up: Vidjagames University

By Jake Young / October 28, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

Pwn Up: Vidjagames University  

 

When I was in my late teens I started looking for a college to attend. At one particular college, I got to preview it overnight - which just so happened to be around when Halo 2 came out. Throughout the day we were supposed to go see what classes were like, tour the campus, and sit through seminars. Instead, I played Halo 2 in an abandoned classroom with some students and ditched the program. I ended up going to that school after all. I like to think it was Halo 2's doing.

-Loren

 

I'm an assistant teacher (or at least I think that's a similar term for what I do) at the University of Buenos Aires, here in Argentina.

Since I have to write up the practical exams, I usually try to include some gaming references in them. For example, in this semester's exam, the test was about a company named "Abstergo", whose founder was "Augusto Desmond" and they have to choose between a system called "Renaissance" offered by a company by the name of "Ezio" and a system called "Eagle", offered by "Altair".

 Even though the references are pretty obvious, I've received no comments from the students so far. How disappointing. Students should play more videogames.

 -Gustavo

 

Filed Under   college   pwn my life   pwn up

Article Pwn Up: Con Artists

By Jake Young / November 25, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

undefined

One of my most memorable moments of any Convention to date would of been last year, when me and my friends were waiting for an elevator that seemed to take forever to get to our floor. Finally, it opens up to reveal a full-suited Batman doing Gangnam Style in the elevator with a Cookie Monster underneath. The sheer randomness and unexpected act made me laugh, while my other friends were too shocked to even react. It was one of those moments where you had to be there to fully enjoy it, but I'll never forget the grin on Batman's face as he danced. Oh, how he danced. 

 

 

 - Pash

 

Filed Under   cosplay   smash bros   pwn my life   comic-con   conventions   pwn up

Article Pwn Up: Is That a 3DS In Your Pants?

By Andrew Bridgman / May 6, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

Pwn Up: The Pwn - Image 2
Yesterday I had to dress nicely for a photoshoot my school was doing to send out to various camps I will be working at this summer. As any other normal day, I carried my 3DS in my pocket unaware of it's pronounced outline in my dress pants. I just got the photos back and in every photo you can see a large rectangle on the front of my pants.-Jeffrey

My wife just gave birth to our first child. We've certainly had some nerdy moments throughout this.

  1. Our music playlist. At the facility, we were allowed to bring in our own music players with playlists to help the mothers relax and get through labor. Of the small playlist we selected, some of the tunes were mixes from Final Fantasy, Chrono Trigger, and Kingdom Hearts.
  2. We had a doula, a woman that acts as an assistant during the pregnancy and birth. Towards the end of the labor, my wife does the expected "Please, make this stop" and "I can't do this anymore" and my job was to keep encouraging her. "This will be a triumph…" I said. The doula chimes in, "Yes, it will!" I say, "We're going to make a note here, this will be a huge success." Again, the doula agrees, oblivious that I was working my way through Still Alive. My wife was looking at me the whole time, going "Smartass…"
  3. Being the mother, she had priority in choosing the first name, Stephan, a tribute to her late sister, Stephanie. I got to choose the middle name. I wanted to go with Sabin, from Final Fantasy 6, but we're in Louisiana, and everybody would think we were honoring LSU's head coach Sabine. Almost went with Balthier, but I wasn't that attached to FFXII. So we welcomed Stephan Auron Hand into the world.
-Bob

Around the beginning of March, I found myself bored with the lack of interesting games being released. I decided that I'd make it my goal to beat every Final Fantasy made for the traditional consoles (SNES, PS1, PS2, etc.) I was so excited about this idea that I told my friend, who is a Final Fantasy fanatic, about it. Not only did he think it was a great idea, but he also decided take on the exact same task I set for myself. He now has his own personal gaming closet in my apartment. He comes over every other day, even if I'm not home; opens the closet and starts playing away. We now spend our nights lounging in chairs and playing Final Fantasy on two screens, and in no way is that depressing.-Adam

Pwn Up: The Pwn - Image 1
Filed Under   pwn my life   pwn up

Article The Best of Gamer Dogs

By Chloe Cole / March 11, 2014

The internet loves nothing more than dogs playing video games. But how do the dogs feel about it? Enjoy this compilation of the best gamer dogs pictures.

 

Gamer Dogs or Dogs Wearing IllFitting Headsets

 They're playing Howl of Duty: Modern Dogfare (this is a warning: LOTTA dog puns comin' atcha).

(via)

Filed Under   animals   pets

Article Pwn Up: Say My Name

By Jake Young / February 24, 2014

Like the pine trees lining the winding road, you've got a name. You've got a name. This week on Pwn Up, we wanted you to share the stories behind your gamertags, RPG characters, and any other psuedonym used for nerdy adventuring. If you have a moment so nerdy that you need to tell the Internet about it, we want you to send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

 

Pwn Up: Say My Name

 I always, in literally every game I play, name my character "Rook". I started doing this because my brother, sister, and I would always watch 3 Ninjas and then run around the house pretending to be the main characters. When I saw this week's topic I decided to re-watch this important piece of my childhood and I came to a bleak realization. Years of my identity was based on a VERY mediocre 1992 movie, and there was no character named "Rook". There was somenone named Rocky, and my siblings never corrected me once. If only Colt or Tum-tum were here to help me cope.

 

-John

Filed Under   pwn my life   xbox live   pwn up   gamertag   screenname   psn