Articles

(Page 25)

Article Rapping Shop Owners, Item Rentals, and Destroying Evil: Our Review of the New Zelda Game

By Andrew Bridgman / November 15, 2013

Review: The Legend of Zelda A Link Between Worlds

 

What You Need To Know About The Legend of Zelda - A Link Between Worlds:

  • The map is a near identical recreation of the Hyrule from A Link to the Past, for better or worse. It's fun to come back to a familiar world with new twists added to it, but at the same time there's less sense of discovery.

  • You get to rent and purchase pretty much all the big items you would normally get through the course of a normal Zelda game (hookshot, bow & arrow, etc.) at the beginning of the game AND IT IS AMAZING.

  • Instead of having a magic meter and item collecting (set number of bombs, arrows, etc.), you have one single general meter for magic and items that automatically refills AND IT IS AMAZING.

  • A mother and father who seem very worried about the whereabouts of their young child don't seem to be too concerned when you tell them that their child is a magic sage who is now in a dimension separate from our own to help destroy an ancient evil, which is weird.

  • There's a rapping shop owner.

  • REPEAT: THERE'S A RAPPING SHOP OWNER.

Filed Under   zelda   rap   reviews   dorkly review   link between worlds

Article How To Deal With Every Kind of April Fool's Day Prank

By Andrew Bridgman / April 1, 2014

Entertainment News Site Has a Major Scoop

Batman vs. Superman is actually gonna star Christian Bale as Batman now? Steven Spielberg is taking over the new Star Wars movies and they're going to crossover with the Harry Potter universe? Wow - very subtle with the PRANKS, MOVIE NEWS INTERNET SITES!

How To Deal With Every Kind of April Fools Day Prank

What To Do: Write "NUH-UH - NOT BUYING IT!" in the comments. Add "YOU JUST GOT APRIL SCHOOL'D!!" if you feel your comment warrants it.

 

Friend or Relative Alerts You of a Major Life Event Via Text

Your cousin is getting married? Your best friend just found out she was pregnant? Your dad was hit head-on by a semi-truck and is in the ICU of the local hospital, where your mom is sitting in the waiting room, catatonic from shock and a grief so deep it is completely unknowable?

Could these people BE any more obvious with their pranks? (classic Chandler reference)

How To Deal With Every Kind of April Fools Day Prank

What To Do: Text back "PSSSSSSSSH - APRIL TOOLS DAY IS MORE LIKE IT!" Because they're all a bunch of piss-poor prankin' tools, that is.

Filed Under   pranks   april fools

Article Humble Bundle Math

By Andrew Bridgman / September 12, 2013
Humble Bundle Math

Filed Under   charity   indie games   fez   humble bundle   ftl

Article Star Trek's Uhura Was Convinced To Stay On The Show...By Martin Luther King Jr.

By Andrew Bridgman / January 20, 2014

  

 

While Star Trek is often dismissed as a weird subsection of nerd culture, it's hard to downplay how hugely important it was to society (outside of the convention world) - the series, the brainchild of creator Gene Roddenberry, presented a vision of the future that was almost unheard of at the time (near the height of the Cold War): it was a future that was bright, where the possibilities were endless. It was a future where people of all beliefs, nationalities, creeds, races, and species worked together to achieve great things. It was a future of tolerance and peace. While the rest of the world was expecting the future to be one of burnt skies and atomic fallout, Star Trek said we'd be traveling through space (granted - to 1920's gangster planets and also wrestling with lizard people, but still).

Also, it contained the first scripted interracial on-screen kiss in television history, between Nichelle Nichols' Lieutenant Uhura and William Shatner's Captain Kirk (granted - while both were being controlled by faux-Greek aliens using telekinesis, but still).

Filed Under   star trek   neil degrasse tyson

Article The 10 Most WTF Examples of Doctor Who Fan Fiction

By Chloe Cole / November 21, 2013

On November 23rd, the BBC show, "Doctor Who," will celebrate its 50th Anniversary with a special television event called "The Day of the Doctor." To prepare for D-Day, enjoy these titles and excerpts from the most NSFW Doctor Who fan fiction on the internet.

 

Conjugal Visits

by clare009

"The Doctor and River take advantage of their legal rights in unconventional ways."

(via)

Because Doctor Who is all about following the rules.

Filed Under   wtf   fan fiction   doctor who   nsfw

Article Darth Vader Has Some Questions For the Emperor

By Andrew Bridgman / March 28, 2014
Darth Vader Has Some Questions For The Emperor

Article Pwn Up: Friendship is Tragic

By Jake Young / November 18, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

Pwn Up: Friendship is Tragic

 

So back in the day my friends and I were having a Halo 2 match using nothing but shotguns and sniper rifles. We were all playing at my house and it was all on one TV. As such screen peeking was an issue, but as friends we tried not to peek in order to keep it competitive. I had found a great perch to snipe from and was doing my best when I noticed buddy Michael's player had stopped moving. I couldn't help myself and looked at his screen only to notice that he had a shotgun pointed right at someone's head at point blank range. By the time the light bulb flicked on and I realized what was happening I was dead. Now here's the kicker. In the game he had snuck up behind me, put the barrel right against my head, and then in real life he turned and waited for me to notice. Only when he saw my expression change did he blow my head off. In hindsight it was hilarious, but in that moment I got pissed and punched him in the shoulder as hard as I could.....and dislocated it. We popped it back in, but we decided to take a break from Halo for a while.

 

-Tyler

Filed Under   the sims   pwn my life   sonic   mario party   knuckles   pwn up

Article The 20 Best Dorkly Articles of 2013 (#20 - #11)

By Staff / December 24, 2013

Filed Under   best of 2013

Article 7 More Videogame Worlds It Would Seriously Suck To Live In

By Andrew Bridgman / April 2, 2014

1. Civilization

6 More Videogame Worlds It Would Seriously Suck To Live In

Welcome to your new civilization! As a citizen of this new society, you will be ruled by an immortal god-king with complete control over every aspect of your life and the entire civilization. Also, you will be more or less in a state of constant warfare with the rest of the world. Building ANYTHING takes decades upon decades. If you're one of the unfortunate few who's drafted into the war effort, you may very well end up being a spearman or a horseback rider stuck battling a friggin' TANK.

Oh, and you're always in danger of being nuked by Gandhi - or if you happen to live in Gandhi's civilization, always in danger of being retaliation-nuked by EVERYONE ELSE who Gandhi just started  a nuclear war with.

 

2. Sonic the Hedgehog

6 More Videogame Worlds It Would Seriously Suck To Live In

The world of Sonic is generally pretty terrible - everything is divided into insanely-dangerous, completely incongruous 'zones' - from lava-filled ruins to a world of enormous casinos to a place that's just nothing but pollution. And odds are you're going to be a tiny forest critter who's subjected to one of two fates: either being locked in a capsule, waiting desperately for anyone to come by and press a button to release you (hopefully they come fast enough) or getting a sweet robot-body and inevitably having it destroyed by an out-of-control enormous hedgehog whose body is essentially covered in blades. You're nothing but a pawn caught between groups of beings trying to collect super-gems that will give them Dragonball Z knockoff powers.

And while humans DID become part of the Sonic mythos later on (not including Dr. Robotnik, who was bizarrely the only human present for the first couple games in the series), life isn't gonna be much better for you. In fact, there's a pretty good chance you'll be kissing anthropomorphic hedgehogs before you know it. 

Filed Under   the sims   oregon trail   sonic   civilization

Article Everything You Need To Know About Tonight's Community (Season 5, Episode 3)

By Andrew Bridgman / January 9, 2014

Everything You Need To Know About Tonights Community Season 5, Episode 3

This episode is titled "Basic Intergluteal Numismatics."

Intergluteal meaning "between buttocks" and numismatics meaning "currency, primarily coins". And, uh, basic meaning..."basic". So basically (see what I did there?) - Coins Between Butt-Cheeks.

Everything You Need To Know About Tonights Community Season 5, Episode 3

...and they delivered.

Filed Under   community