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Article The Weekly IRL: 6 Beautiful Covers of Videogame Songs

October 7, 2010

Filed Under   the weekly irl   music

Article More Than Mario Bargained For

October 20, 2010
  1. Toad

    Thank you Mario! But our princess is in another castle!

  2. Mario

    Well, okay-wait, what?

  3. Toad


  4. Mario

    Another castle? You mean there's more than one castle?

  5. Toad

  6. Mario

    Because a castle is a pretty big deal. I was all "well, here's the castle! And a boss battle! Game over". Seemed pretty final.

  7. Toad

    We have a lot of castles.

  8. Mario

    What kind of housing market exclusively has castles? And I have to return Princess Peach to her castle…

  9. Toad

    Everyone has a castle!

  10. Mario

    Not me. I live in Brooklyn. Luigi sometimes goes hungry.

  11. Toad

    Only Luigi?

Filed Under   conversations   mario

Article Pwn Up: Con Artists

By Jake Young / November 25, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.


One of my most memorable moments of any Convention to date would of been last year, when me and my friends were waiting for an elevator that seemed to take forever to get to our floor. Finally, it opens up to reveal a full-suited Batman doing Gangnam Style in the elevator with a Cookie Monster underneath. The sheer randomness and unexpected act made me laugh, while my other friends were too shocked to even react. It was one of those moments where you had to be there to fully enjoy it, but I'll never forget the grin on Batman's face as he danced. Oh, how he danced. 



 - Pash


Filed Under   cosplay   smash bros   pwn my life   comic-con   conventions   pwn up

Article Virtual Shackles: Made This Way

By Virtual Shackles / June 20, 2011

See more by Virtual Shackles!

Filed Under   virtual shackles

Article Pwn Up: CONFESSION OF SORROW IV: The Mask of Infinite Truth

By Kevin Corrigan / October 7, 2011

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

My girlfriend has been dragging me to Yoga for the last two weeks. At the end of every class, we have to meditate and we're told to focus our energy into something that we want to come true. I continue to try to create the Spirit Bomb. I'm hoping it comes true next week so I don't have to go to yoga anymore.-Kyle K.

I had to go out of town on business for a week immediately after getting Fallout: New Vegas. Naturally, I packed my PS3 and RCA cables. I expected to be able to play on whatever shitty TV they had in the hotel room. Well, the TV didn't have any inputs at all. My PS3 was useless. The first thing I did, even before unpacking my clothes, was to go online and order an unreasonably expensive adapter that converts RCA to USB so I could plug the PS3 into my company issued laptop. I paid for it, as well as overnight shipping, on the company credit card. Upon my return I had to explain the expense and the unapproved software on the laptop. In retrospect, I could have covered my tracks better, but I think the residents of New Vegas appreciated it in the end.-Anonymous

In 8th grade, I got in a fight with a kid because he said he beat Battletoads without using Game Genie. I've GOTTEN passed the Turbo Tunnel. I know that it does not get any easier. That kid will forever be a liar in my mind.-Anonymous

When my girlfriend found out she was pregnant, I was excited to name our future son. Being an unwed couple and long-time fans of A Song of Ice and Fire, we decided we would name him Jon Snow. We got married two months ago, Jon Snow no longer seemed appropriate. Last week Robert Stark was born weighing in at 9 lbs 6 ounces. I'm getting him a husky puppy as soon as he can walk.-Patrick

Filed Under   pwn my life

Article Pwn Up: Is That a 3DS In Your Pants?

By Andrew Bridgman / May 6, 2013

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.

Pwn Up: The Pwn - Image 2
Yesterday I had to dress nicely for a photoshoot my school was doing to send out to various camps I will be working at this summer. As any other normal day, I carried my 3DS in my pocket unaware of it's pronounced outline in my dress pants. I just got the photos back and in every photo you can see a large rectangle on the front of my pants.-Jeffrey

My wife just gave birth to our first child. We've certainly had some nerdy moments throughout this.

  1. Our music playlist. At the facility, we were allowed to bring in our own music players with playlists to help the mothers relax and get through labor. Of the small playlist we selected, some of the tunes were mixes from Final Fantasy, Chrono Trigger, and Kingdom Hearts.
  2. We had a doula, a woman that acts as an assistant during the pregnancy and birth. Towards the end of the labor, my wife does the expected "Please, make this stop" and "I can't do this anymore" and my job was to keep encouraging her. "This will be a triumph…" I said. The doula chimes in, "Yes, it will!" I say, "We're going to make a note here, this will be a huge success." Again, the doula agrees, oblivious that I was working my way through Still Alive. My wife was looking at me the whole time, going "Smartass…"
  3. Being the mother, she had priority in choosing the first name, Stephan, a tribute to her late sister, Stephanie. I got to choose the middle name. I wanted to go with Sabin, from Final Fantasy 6, but we're in Louisiana, and everybody would think we were honoring LSU's head coach Sabine. Almost went with Balthier, but I wasn't that attached to FFXII. So we welcomed Stephan Auron Hand into the world.

Around the beginning of March, I found myself bored with the lack of interesting games being released. I decided that I'd make it my goal to beat every Final Fantasy made for the traditional consoles (SNES, PS1, PS2, etc.) I was so excited about this idea that I told my friend, who is a Final Fantasy fanatic, about it. Not only did he think it was a great idea, but he also decided take on the exact same task I set for myself. He now has his own personal gaming closet in my apartment. He comes over every other day, even if I'm not home; opens the closet and starts playing away. We now spend our nights lounging in chairs and playing Final Fantasy on two screens, and in no way is that depressing.-Adam

Pwn Up: The Pwn - Image 1
Filed Under   pwn my life   pwn up

Article The Best of Gamer Dogs

By Chloe Cole / March 11, 2014

The internet loves nothing more than dogs playing video games. But how do the dogs feel about it? Enjoy this compilation of the best gamer dogs pictures.


Gamer Dogs or Dogs Wearing IllFitting Headsets

 They're playing Howl of Duty: Modern Dogfare (this is a warning: LOTTA dog puns comin' atcha).


Filed Under   animals   pets

Article Pwn Up: Say My Name

By Jake Young / February 24, 2014

Like the pine trees lining the winding road, you've got a name. You've got a name. This week on Pwn Up, we wanted you to share the stories behind your gamertags, RPG characters, and any other psuedonym used for nerdy adventuring. If you have a moment so nerdy that you need to tell the Internet about it, we want you to send your submissions to dorklypwnup at gmail.


Pwn Up: Say My Name

 I always, in literally every game I play, name my character "Rook". I started doing this because my brother, sister, and I would always watch 3 Ninjas and then run around the house pretending to be the main characters. When I saw this week's topic I decided to re-watch this important piece of my childhood and I came to a bleak realization. Years of my identity was based on a VERY mediocre 1992 movie, and there was no character named "Rook". There was somenone named Rocky, and my siblings never corrected me once. If only Colt or Tum-tum were here to help me cope.



Filed Under   pwn my life   xbox live   pwn up   gamertag   screenname   psn

Article The Weekly IRL: 7 Pictures of Nerdy Garments

February 17, 2011

Filed Under   the weekly irl

Article The Dorklyst: The 7 Greatest Videogame Movies

By Sophie Prell / September 28, 2011

Poor Bob Hoskins. While we'll all fondly remember his adorable alcoholism and devil may care attitude in toon noir film Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, we'll also forever remember him as chubsy wubsy Mario Mario in the Super Mario Bros. movie. And if there's one thing we gamers (and Bob Hoskins) can't stand, it's bad videogame movie adaptations.

What is it about videogame stories that Hollywood just can't get right? While novel adaptations will always have their "the book was so much better" crowd, the kindest words we can say about videogame films is typically, "Well the vomit didn't actually exit my mouth…" So let me put your mind — and stomach — at ease. Here's a list of films that, while not fantastic, are at least tolerable; the best videogame movies you'll ever see. And keep in mind "best" is a relative term, because for every entry on this list, there's three Uwe Boll sh*t sandwiches.

Break out the popcorn, and let's get rolling.

7. Prince of Persia: Sands of Time

Jerry Bruckheimer is a pretty cool dude. He took a boring kids ride at Disney World that just about everyone had either willfully forgotten or just plain ignored and turned it into a pop culture phenomenon, complete with a captivated, yet ultimately ignorant, youthful audience. Oh, you want to be a pirate, do you? That's cute. Let's get you started with a routine rape and plundering of an unarmed fishing village, and then we'll set you adrift on the ocean where you can lose your teeth, sanity, and eventually life to scurvy. Cute, isn't it?

So it was nice of Bruckheimer to at least attempt to bring some life into the videogame to film adaptation market. Big-budget special effects, Alfred Molina, Ben Kingsley — oh I'm sorry, Sir Ben Kingsley — and Chesty Jake seem like a recipe for a movie that would leave no sour aftertaste. Ultimately though, that's all the movie was: a summer popcorn flick with all style and no substance. Still, it was a fun ride while it lasted. Now who wants to take me on in an ostrich race?

6. Lara Croft: Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life

It's weird to think of a time when Lara Croft was the name in jungle/ancient ruin exploration instead of Nathan Drake. And lately, the famous Ms. Croft seems to be channeling horror film The Descent more than a female cross between James Bond and Indiana Jones. Which, by the way, in case you haven't seen The Descent, do so. Now. It's even got a little dig at the long-running Eidos/Crystal Dynamics franchise!

But back when Lara was still on top of her game — and Angelina Jolie wasn't busy crossing off third-world countries to adopt from like she was collecting Beanie Babies — there was this little diddy of a movie. While the first stumbled over its own feet in terms of pacing and an appropriate sense of wonder, this sequel delivered exactly what fans wanted: Lara Croft in skin-tight outfits, kicking ass, exploring appropriately awe-inspiring locales in the quest to stop baddies from wielding that which man was not meant to use.

Again, a popcorn flick and not much else, but at least it gets points for having not one, but two full colons in its title. Because God knows that's the one thing it would've been missing otherwise.

Filed Under   the dorklyst