- Commander
Okay guys. The Zerg rush is coming faster than we thought. I’m going to need four guys-quick!
Pause.
- Commander
Hello? Guys in the barracks?
- Marine
I won’t shoot anyone until I get some minerals.
- Commander
What?
- Marauder
Me too! And I want gas.
- Commander
Why do you want-
- Marauder
I require more vespene gas.
- Commander
That makes no sense. And how do you want me to deliver you gas? And why?
- Marine
Fact is we need minerals.
- Commander
We are all going to die if you don’t shoot them.
- Marine
You gonna give me orders?
- Commander
Yes! Stop asking that! Look, there are literally tens of thousands minerals on this map, can you just kill them all and go get stuff later?
- Marine
No.
- Commander
Fine. How many minerals?
- Marine
Fifty.
- Commander
Okay, I have 200. Come on, four guys! Let’s go!
- Marine
Wait! One at a time. Sometimes two. Union stuff.
- Commander
Come on!
- Marine
Hold on! I need thirty seconds to be trained!
- Commander
That is way too long! Also way, way not enough training. Somehow it’s a disaster in both directions. All cause of your stupid union and minerals. It makes no sense! Forget the minerals!
- Marine
Why can’t you just send in the SCV’s? They’re armored cutting machines.
- Commander
But they’ll all die! And then we won’t be able to get…any…
- Marine
…
- Commander
uh…
- Marine
You lying bastard.
