The Dorklyst: The 8 Most Irresponsible Drinkers in Videogame History

By Andrew Bridgman / February 8, 2013

BONUS: The Great Drinkers of Gaming

The Dorklyst: The 8 Most Irresponsible Drunks in Videogame History - Image 10

Some guys are equally or even more effective when they're drunk, sending a real bad message to kids everywhere, but also being pretty impressive that they haven't completely bottomed-out yet. They include:

Max Payne (Max Payne 3)Max Payne spends the first half of his 3rd game in a drunken haze – he downs bottles of whiskey like they're juice boxes, he grieves endlessly about the losses he's suffered, he throws painkillers down his throat like Tic-Tacs…and he remains the most insanely-competent bodyguard/killing machine in South America. He regularly fends off kidnappers, hired goons, and anyone else who would dare mess with him. He gives up the bottle eventually, but there's no noticeable difference in his abilities. Pullquote: "This guy's such an efficient killer while drunk they should call him Michael C. Alco-Hall! …you know, the guy who plays Dexter."

Brad Wong (Dead or Alive 3)Brad Wong's entire style of martial arts is dependent on him being drunk at all times. While he appears out of control and unpredictable, he's actually very focused and studied in this noble tradition.
Pullquote: "This boozer ain't no loser! He's a winner drunk on paint thinner!"

Ethan (Condemned 2: Bloodshot)Ethan's a homeless alcoholic – and his alcoholism manifests itself in the form of a demonic doppelganger that occasionally taunts Ethan. Sounds pretty bad, right? Well, sorta, except it also helps out Ethan a lot, giving him key information and guidance at certain junctures. Plus, drinking steadies Ethan's aim. This all comes to an end once he's forced to kill his Drunk Demon, but even then it's replaced by an Acceptance Demon.
Pullquote: "Alcohol demon, huh? Probably should call him Beer-elzebub! Okay, I'll stop, I'll stop."

Filed Under   alcohol   the dorklyst
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