Crazy Taxi Hires Terrible People

By Lev Novak / June 8, 2011
  1. Passenger

    Hey, I need to get to Union and Packard.

  2. Driver

    Where is that? Oh wait, the giant blinking green square-thing? No problem.

  3. Passenger

    What? No, nothing is blinking. Are you okay?

  4. Driver

    Yup, the good old 'giant blinking square'. I'll just follow this giant green arrow hovering in the air as fast as possible.

  5. Passenger

    What?

  6. Driver

    Hold on tight, because we are going to hit a lot of things.

  7. Passenger

    Are you insane? That's not even close. Listen, the most important part is that-

  8. Driver

    -we get there in the absolute shortest time at all costs.

  9. Passenger

    That no one die.

  10. Driver

    I only have 49 seconds left in this round. Hey, do you mind if I blare some Offspring? It's basically all I listen to, for some reason.

  11. 12 seconds later.

  12. Passenger

    That was the worst! You hit half the cars and a third of the pedestrians and you completely went out of your way to make reckless jumps.

  13. Driver

    You paid me extra when I did that.

  14. Passenger

    Okay, maybe a mixed message there. But come on! Where did you learn to drive?

  15. Driver

    Hey buddy, I have a class C license here!

  16. Passenger

    That doesn't sound very good.

  17. Driver

    Have you ever tried this game? It's actually pretty impressive..

  18. Passenger

    You're crazy. You're absolutely crazy.

  19. Driver

    I'm crazy? Sir, that drive took eighteen seconds and cost $280 on a sunny day. My company is called "Crazy Taxi" and you decided to enter. You saw me hit three cars on the way to pick you up. You could have walked and preserved the environment. And I'm the crazy one?

  20. Passenger

    You killed four people.

  21. Driver

    Yeah, I guess that happened.

Filed Under   conversations   crazy taxi
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