Pwn My Life: Issue #72

By Kevin Corrigan / April 22, 2011

Ever had a moment so nerdy that you needed to tell the Internet about it? Send your submissions to dorklypwnmylife at gmail.

My Freshman year, I went on Spring Break to Waikiki, Hawaii. It was beautiful. I hiked, swam and boated everywhere on the island. However, the only pictures that I took were of the buildings that were featured in Tony Hawk Underground. The design and placement were perfect. The only phone call I made was to my friend in Texas to tell him how they were exactly the same.-Anonymous
I signed up to be a beta tester for the Everquest expansion, House of Thule, as soon as registration opened. It wasn't for the new content, gear or AA. It was for housing. I spent about 400 hours during testing messing around with houses. This allowed me to figure out exactly what lot I would want when the expansion went live. The day before the patch, I camped myself right where the ramp down to the housing zone would appear I download the patch as soon as it was available. I literally bolted down to the gate when it was finished, went to the exact plot I wanted and bought it. My house is considered one of the best on the server I play on.-Anonymous
A friend and I bugged another friend of ours to play World of Warcraft for two years. He has wanted to, but his parents wouldn't let him. They're religious and don't tolerate games with magic, because "magic comes straight from Satan." He finally caved last night, bought the game, went home and told his parents that he's an Atheist.-Austin


My wife left me because of Minecraft and Wikipedia.-Bob
I was at a party a while ago and I was grinding hardcore with this chick. After 30 minutes of dancing, we left the party to be alone. One thing led to another in the backseat of my car. After we were done, I went to put on my pants. When I grabbed them, my Magic: the Gathering deck spilled out of my back pocket onto the seat. I then, of course, proceeded to gather my cards and search the back of the car to make sure I didn't leave any of them behind. I have not heard from her since.-Ben
A few weeks ago, my video card started acting screwy. I couldn't afford a new one right away. I played almost all of Super Meat Boy without being able to see any saw blade or missiles above the top half of the screen. It made it the even harderest game ever.-Anonymous
I'm a PhD candidate, so this requires some explanation. A protein is a string of amino acids. There are 20 amino acids, each of which can be represented by a single letter code when looking at a protein sequence. Another graduate student was presenting his project via powerpoint, and showed a protein sequence. Within one second of it being on screen, I started laughing, because right in the middle of the protein sequence were six amino acids represented by the letters "ASSHAT." I had to explain to everyone else what was so funny. The guy who originally characterized the protein didn't realize that ASSHAT was in the sequence until he was defending his PhD thesis. In other words, it took him four years of staring at the sequence to notice it, while I saw ASSHAT within a second.-Zach
And this week's "I can't tell if this is real or not, but it's funny" award goes to:The game Rock Band, sadly, played out like an actual band experience for my friends and I. We started out small, but eventually became one of the higher ranked bands on the xbox leaderboard. Eventually, the guitarist and bassist started fighting over who was better at guitar. The bassist got into drugs and dropped out of the band. After a couple months with replacement bassists that didn't work out, the singer moved away with his girlfriend. The guitarist quit to find better things to do and left me, the drummer, searching for a new band to play in. After many failed attempts at finding new bandmates via messageboards I retired from the game of Rock Band.-Adam

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