Overheard on Xbox: Issue #46

By Jeff Rosenberg / April 19, 2011

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious on Xbox Live? Send your submissions to overheardonxbox at gmail

I tried Kinect for the first time last night at my friend's house. During an intense game of Beach Volleyball I tried to spike the ball, and proceeded to scrape my hand on his spackled cement ceiling. My hand started to bleed profusely all over the floor. Instead of pausing the game though, we decided to finish the match. Needless to say, I had major bragging rights on the ride to the hospital to stitch my hand back up.-Jon
This happened to a female friend of mine. Her (now ex) boyfriend was playing Team Fortress 2 online, when she decided she was bored, so she dressed up in her best lingerie and seductively walked out to the living room. She leaned up against the wall and gave him a 'come hither' and all she got in reply was "Not now. I'm playing team fortress." She very angrily returned to being bored in the room. He slept on the couch.-Pman


Whenever me and my friends play MvC3 or street fighter, we sing popular pop songs but add our own lyrics depending on what we're doing to the opponent. For example, if I play Zangeif in SSFIV, I sing "I throw my opponents in the air sometimes sayin' ayyyyyyooooo, you just got KO'd!", or my friend, Danny sings "Baby, Baby, BABY, NO!" whenever shutting someone down.-Ty (sick of CoD submissions)
A friend and I convinced a kid who must have been 9 to show us a glitch on COD: Nazi Zombies, involving getting on top of a computer. We then stole the glitch and went into a new lobby, with two other 10-11 year olds. Decided to mess with them by performing the glitch and then telling them we "worked for treyarch" and so our characters could jump higher. Needless to say they bought it, and we spent the rest of the 34 round game telling them all about treyarch headquarters and how all of the people on my friends list are employees of treyarch, each with more ridiculous job titles than the last. Later that week I was invited into a game with the younger of the two kids, who then introduced me to all of his friends and announced that I was his hero. He still adds me to games till this day. I could never tell him it was all a lie, I mean, who doesn't want to be "Managing Creative Director of Human Resources" and the original creator of Nazi Zombies. Also this kid believes I will get him a job at Treyarch when he hits 18. Am I a bad person?-Scott G, from Scotland
Just lost a Black Ops Match to the sound of an 11 year old screaming, "Mom, Mom, MOM, MOM, I killed him with my C4!  Yeah with my C4!"-CJ
While playing Halo: Reach a group of people in my gaming community were looking for a nice, friendly match of Slayer, which, of course, is impossible on Xbox Live. We get into a match, and one of the guys on the opposing team immediately starts giving us shit for no real reason.OPPOSING TEAM: Yeah, yeah, I bet you're fat 'cause all you do is sit around and play Halo!GUY ON MY TEAM: Nah. I'm fat because whenever I fuck you mom, she gives me a cookie.-Ciarra
Back in my haydays of XBL, I was in a rather one-sided game of Cat and Mouse in Project Gotham Racing 3. About halfway through the match, an opposing team member finally snapped and got into an extensive argument with someone on our team.  It came to the point where one of them asks, "Where do you live?!", and the other one replies, "(Neighborhood), West Virginia). The guy who asked the question yells, "OH SHIT!!!", and leaves the room. 5 minutes later, the guy that remained in the room says, "Oh shit guys,someones knocking my door.".-Matt

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