Overheard on Xbox: Issue #40

March 8, 2011

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious on Xbox Live? Send your submissions to overheardonxbox at gmail.

I was speaking french to a friend of mine on Modern Warfare 2 and some genius, who had earlier claimed to be from the United states, said, "Oh god are you British or some sh*t?" He clearly failed every class of history and geography he's ever been in. —Paul
So I walk into my brother's room to ask him something. He'd just joined a Black Ops lobby when we heard some guy say, "Dude! She's fugly!" and the reply was "I think my mother is pretty fit, actually." —Oli


So I was playing Halo 3, and two guys were having a conversation about doing porn. They kept talking about the agent, how much it pays, it was really strange. At one point in the conversation one guy says "Ya this girl was givin' me head, and she was tryin' to be all neat about it and shit, so I was like 'Bitch, you gotta get sloppy with that shit'."-Wes
I was playing Gears of War 2 multiplayer with a friend one night when my sister asked what I was doing. I replied: "I'm just being awesome on Gears of War." Someone over live went "Shut the fuck up you fucking squeaker!" Being a woman, I simply stated I'm female. "Oh, I'm sorry. Where are you from? I appreciate girl gamers, I wish they weren't so rare. If you live in Minneapolis, we should get together."—Anonymous
A few of my friends and I were dueling each other on Borderlands. And in mid-duel someone entered the game and screamed into their mic "I WILL FUCK YOU UP THE NOSE WITH AN OVENMIT!" and logged off. Right when that happened all shooting stopped and everyone stopped talking for about 30 seconds. —Michael
My friend was on Halo this one time (she's a girl) and she had just joined a match and started talking. After being called a pathetic 12 year old for about 5 minutes she broke down and said she was a girl. Without missing a beat one of her teammates beside her went into crouch mode and said in a thick southern accent "crimsonduck^^ (her gamertag) will you marry me?" It has since been an inside joke with me and her for the past 3 years. —Xenos

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